Jul 21 2012
Jul 21 2012
Jun 09 2012
Even though “the best video game movie” is as low a bar as “the best interior designer at West Point” or “the least murderous Minnesotan,” this movie looks genuinely well-written (if the trailer is any indication).
One minor quibble: I’m a bit tired of traditionally villainous creatures getting recast as protagonists (e.g. vampires in Twilight, dragons in any dragonriding work, sharks in Finding Nemo, Canadians in Dudley Do-Right, zombies in Play Dead, Godzilla in any non-villainous appearance, etc). Personally, I wouldn’t get into an overcrowded niche unless I was REALLY sure I had something new to say.
Apr 27 2012
Campus police officers in Colorado used tranquilizer darts and a trampoline to safely remove a bear hiding in a tree, leading to the photograph of an apparently levitating bear seen below and/or a Matrix-style battle royale.
Feb 19 2012
#4 is accidentally attempting to assassinate the President–it somehow gets worse. Oh, by the way, all five screw-ups happened on one ship (the William D. Porter).
One screw-up Cracked doesn’t mention is that FDR asked his Secret Service attendee to wheel him over to the side of the battleship so that he could see the incoming torpedo. That reminds me of the Nedelin disaster, where a Soviet space commander got ~120 people killed (including himself) by watching a shuttle from the launch pad rather than the bunker.
Feb 05 2012
This is pretty brilliant, albeit not safe for work.
Dec 17 2011
I made this t-shirt on CustomInk. It is a t-shirt for spectacular people.
Dec 02 2011
I ordered a dish at a Korean restaurant and the server said “ooh, that’s spicy.” ”How spicy?” She just handed me a pitcher of water.
Conversations don’t have to be purely linear. You might be able to develop a conversation in an interesting and/or unexpected direction if characters respond to questions and statements in unexpected ways.
B. MAC: This apartment complex looks nice…
LANDLADY: And the pool is beautiful!
B. MAC: …but I’m concerned that several tenants have had toxic black mold. What sort of remediation efforts–
LANDLADY: –COME, YOU MUST SEE POOL.
Nov 30 2011
This is old, but classic. However, because of profanity, it probably isn’t safe for work. Unless, of course, your workplace is awesome.
Nov 01 2011
This is an interesting compilation of things that foreigners found notable and/or quirky about life in the United States. It could be useful if you’re writing about a foreigner visiting the United States or an American traveling abroad.
Oct 21 2011
I have one minor suggestion. Most major donors tend to be older and deeply wealthy businessmen, whereas this video is clearly aimed at a younger, less affluent audience. It might have helped to randomly feature one small donor (maybe by selling $25 or $50 raffle tickets to be featured).
Jun 09 2011
May 20 2011
Unfortunately, it’s really just a generic “here’s what you should do to be ready for any disaster” plan with zombies thrown in for fun. Food and medicine are great, but let’s be honest: You’re not actually ready for a zombie apocalypse until you have a machine gun and two bullets for everybody in the county. (In case you miss, silly).
My zombie defense plan is counterintuitive, but it’s the most popular one in the world.
1. Get eaten.
2. Whatever else happens, it’s not my problem.
Apr 24 2011
Good luck, Vancouver:
Your goalie’s our MVP
Canada: “What can we say?
Even dead cats bounce.”
Apr 13 2011
The writing in A Girl and Her Fed is so strong. The main character isn’t even in the conversation in this page and she still shows an incredible personality.
The art is pretty good so far, similar to The Taxman Must Die but maybe a bit less detailed. (You can see my sample pages here).
Apr 04 2011
For some reason, a lot of the barbs that I find most memorable are British. Probably because Americans spend too much time learning how to cook and rock out on heavy weapons platforms.
Mar 25 2011
Here are some excerpts from my comments and reviews over March 2011.
Dec 25 2010
Tales from the Bully Pulpit was 84 pages of this. Teddy Roosevelt steals HG Wells’ time machine and meets up with Thomas Edison’s ghost to stop Argentinian Nazis from conquering Mars.
Dec 10 2010
The U.S. Army bought about 100,000 M4s last fiscal year, improving the nation’s zombie readiness levels from “doomed” to “screwed.” In your face, zombies! Also, the Navy is working on a electromagnetic railgun. When the zombie dolphins are upon us, we’ll be ready.
Other exciting military technology that could mess some zombies up:
Nov 20 2010
The TSA purportedly confiscated a pair of nail-clippers from a soldier on a military charter where some 230 soldiers were carrying (unloaded) rifles, pistols and machine guns, because the nail-clippers could be used as a weapon. Apparently the TSA is the only thing standing between the world’s unluckiest terrorist and a surefire Darwin Award.
This reminds me of The Boondocks’ (highly profane) trailer for Soul Plane 2…
Continue Reading »
Nov 07 2010
A lack of intense fight scenes kept Jane Austen from making the big time. An oversight finally corrected!
Sep 29 2010
This is pretty funny, especially if you’re familiar with I Have a Little Dreidel (Dreidel, Dreidel, Dreidel).
Aug 25 2010
Vampires Suck is startlingly bad. How could try something so easy–finding something hilariously awful about Twilight–and fail so badly? It’s like going to Alaska and failing to find snow. If you’re in the mood for a good Twilight parody, I recommend this fake screenplay. Here’s an excerpt:
BELLA: It’s tough being the new kid in school! Especially when everyone is so friendly and helpful and interested in me. Why can’t they just leave me alone so I can sit in the corner and cut myself?
CLASSMATE: You’re awesome, Bella!
BELLA: See what I have to put up with? Hey — who are those hot people over there?
CLASSMATE: Those are the Cullens. They avoid direct sunlight, they don’t eat food, they sleep in coffins in a graveyard, and holy water burns them. I think they’re Canadians.*
BELLA: They sure are spectacularly gorgeous.
CLASSMATE: Yes, they are.
BELLA: I mean seriously, those people are BEAUTIFUL. Especially the one who keeps looking at me. Man alive, that guy is stunning. I mean, wow. He is hot buttered seduction on a stick. I’m not interested in him sexually, of course, because sex is dirty, but wow — LOOK AT HIM! Yee-ikes! Hubba hubba! If you don’t mind, I’d like to spend the next 75 pages talking exclusively about how attractive he is, and then bring it up again every paragraph or so for the remaining 400 pages.
CLASSMATE: Knock yourself out.
*The makers of Vampires Suck stole this joke.