Jan 06 2009
Five Common Mistakes of Comic Book Writers (#1-5)
1. The story fails to hook readers in the first three pages.
The easiest way to do this is to show a likable character facing a serious problem. It doesn’t have to be a life-and-death threat, but that helps. Another method is to establish that the writing style is particularly compelling.
2. The plot lacks urgency.
A character walking from his door to his car is not very interesting. Running to his car to make it to work on time is better. Running to his car to avoid gunshots? Even better. To make the plot more urgent, I recommend making giving the characters goals that are time-sensitive and high-stakes. If John doesn’t make it to work in ten minutes, he will be fired. If Captain Carnage can’t find and defuse the bomb in ten minutes, the building will explode. Etc. The goal doesn’t have to be life or death, but it helps.
3. The writers rely too much on exposition (particularly narration and dialogue) to tell the story.
Try not to tell your audience things that they should be able to see in the picture. For example, check out these two versions of one of our panels.
The first version tells us something that should be obvious: this bystander is surprised. Well, of course he’s surprised! His expression already shows that. The second version develops the story by adding humor and makes the mood more wacky.
Here are some signs that your story relies too much on text.
- You use more than 200 words per page. As a rule of thumb, I wouldn’t recommend any more than 175 unless you have a really good reason. If your audience is young and/or the series is action-heavy, you might want to set a guideline for yourself.
- You use big blocks of text, particularly if you use more than one on the same page. Isn’t there any way to bring that information into action, body language or some other visual?
- Characters say how they’re feeling, either in exposition or thought-bubbles. Try using body language and actions instead.
4. The cast is gratuitously large.
If you’re writing a new series about a team of superheroes, I’d recommend using at most 5 teammates. You probably won’t have enough time to develop many characters that are completely unknown to the audience.
Having a large cast will also probably complicate your fight scenes and action sequences. When Green Lantern and Superman are fighting with a villain, what are the other five Justice Leaguers doing? You’ll probably have to flit around to describe what’s happening. That could put off some readers, particularly if some heroes are more interesting in battle than the rest. (I want to see Batman and the Manhunter, not Superman or Wonderwoman).
5. The series doesn’t have a clear audience.
There has never been a comic that appeals to everyone. So you need to pick an audience and go for them. Having an audience in mind will really boost the quality and marketability of your work. For example, if you’re not sure whether you’re writing for 10-year-olds or 20-year-olds, your dialogue will almost certainly miss the mark. It’s also extremely difficult to write comedy unless you know who you’re trying to amuse.
Finally, aiming for a particular audience will make it easier to find a publisher. If you have a narrow, well-aimed audience, your publisher will probably conclude that you are competent and have at least a basic grasp of marketing. If the work doesn’t have a clear audience, the publisher will probably wonder if this book is going to sell at all. If the publisher isn’t confident the book will sell, they probably won’t pick up the series.
Here are some possible audience groups to consider.
- Males vs. females. This should probably affect the proportion of the series that is devoted to combat rather than dialogue. (Broadly generalizing, women usually dislike rolling slugfests like Dragonball Z but are usually more excited than men about romantic adventures). Also, if you’re even thinking about women readers, try to avoid boob-shots and other cheesecake.
- Pre-teens vs. teens vs. college and above. Among other things, this will probably affect how much text you use, the sophistication of the comedy and writing, how much of the plot you have to spell out for the readers, the mood of the story and the level of violence/sex/drugs. Most comic book readers are 16-25; most superhero cartoon shows are aimed at a much younger audience.
- Fans of a particular genre (sci-fi, horror, comedy, etc.) This should affect artistic style, which plot devices are acceptable, origin stories, etc.
- Fans of a particular show or series.
Did you find this article useful? If so, please read the other articles in this series.
- Part 1
- Part 2
In comics, big visuals are important, like explosions and rippling muscles and such.
What about the small things? Like say you have a really tough character and he’s got a little gold pendant around his neck. Would that add anything to the character or would it get ignored?
And all such things and such.
I think some small things are ok. But there is definitely a limit, would you like to draw Captain America’s or Deathstroke’s scales on their costume? Of course not. I think a gold pendant is ok, it’s simple, but I doubt it would add much to the character unless it meant something. Maybe, it reminds him of a time when it was easier or something cheesy like that. Or it’s meant to show that the tough character has a soft spot or robbed a corpse.
I hope my alternative to #1 works with the introduction of aliens first.
Fortunately, I think my first six pages are very interesting. They feature:
-The brief alien introduction
- Introduction to the setting
- Introduction to Adrian
- Adrian’s first daydream
I think those four things are pretty good for the first few pages. I want he publisher to say “He did really well on those first few pages. Let’s see how he does with an entire issue.”
I dare say, I think I have a knack for comic writing. But let’s not get our hopes up… that’s how you get crushed.
With the gold pendant example…
–I’m fairly sure it would get noticed, particularly if gold stands out on his costume. If you’re concerned about whether readers notice, you could have him do something that draws attention to it. For example, show him putting it on, etc.
– I don’t get what the pendant is supposed to show about his character. So he’s a tough character with a gold pendant. It could show that he has a softer side (if this is like a locket with a picture of his parents inside or something), but that’s not necessarily so. Maybe he just likes bling. Unless you actually do something with the pendant, I don’t think it’s going to show much about the character. However, sometimes an accessory can have a symbolic significance on its own. For example, Beast sometimes wears glasses to help remind readers that he’s a lot smarter than he looks.
Speaking more generally…
1. If it’s important, make sure we notice it. For example, you can place it prominently in a panel, mention it in dialogue, etc. But don’t draw our attention to it unless it’s important!
2. Don’t waste your artist’s time with an accessory unless it matters. (For example, Captain America’s scales are an extravagance non-Marvel writers cannot afford). Generally, I’d say that accessories are a waste unless they show us something about the character.
3. Accessories may also be useful if they take up empty space that would otherwise look bad, but then I’d recommend keeping them simple. For example, Agent Orange’s head had a lot of dead-space at the top because alligators don’t have hair. The easiest way to fix that is to use a simple accessory like horns.
Umm, big muscles are fine, but you’ve got to make sure you don’t go too far.
I thought up a little sequence that I thought I could use in a later work. I wrote it as a comic script. Obviously, it is better than what I have below, but this is the super-simplified version.
On the first page there is a hallway with a teen boy running down it, and in the last panel he looks over his shoulder and almost swears.
On the second page he screeches to a halt and draws a sword, commenting that “I should’a known one of you ugly little freaks would be hassling me sooner or later”. A creature leaps at him.
On the third page he slashes out with his sword. A few drops of blood splash back on him.
On the fourth page he kicks the creature off the sword and keeps running.
It’s not going anywhere anytime soon, but I think it would hook readers. What do you think?
A few thoughts and observations…
–This could probably be condensed to somewhere between 1-2 pages.
–I don’t feel really hooked. What’s the character like? He doesn’t have much of a personality yet. I don’t really care about whether he lives or not.
–I’m not sure whether this is a “modern magic” story (like Buffy the Vampire Slayer) or a medieval-esque fantasy. I’d recommend fleshing out the setting (particularly the location and era) more. What kind of hallway is it?
I should just mention that I’m writing it as a manga rather than a comic. Manga tend to have less restriction on page number; I once read one with a seventy page chapter.
I just put in the key events, there are a few panels between. I was thinking about the beginning and characterization, and I thought I could solve it like this:
On page five he comes up to a huge, intricate door. Through a short explanation he reveals that he has to seal the Big Bad away to prevent him from releasing any more magical creatures that kill people.
He goes through and comes to a crossroads on page six . He thinks to himself that “It looks pretty plain to be the edge of the universe”. He hears a voice and turns around.
Just as he is heading down a road labeled “Langi – God of Evil” on page seven , a young boy runs through the door and grabs him. It’s his brother begging him not to go, because of the possibility that he might die. They have this exchange:
Page nine:
Little Bro: “Come home! You don’t need to do this!”
Big Bro: “Lemme spell this out: yes. I. do.”
Little Bro: “Well, I’m here now, and you wouldn’t send me back alone. I wouldn’t mind going with you, but it’s really dangerous and you wouldn’t risk it.”
Page ten:
BB (thoughts): “Ugh, he’s right. Sneaky little… Wait a sec…”
BB: “Okay bro, you got me. If I can’t send you back alone, and I can’t take you with me…” (forces LB to sit down) “…you are gonna wait right here until Dad comes to fetch you.”
I really have to give them some names.
It’s a modern magic plot. It seems a little medieval or even ancient at first, because the hallway looks old, and it resembles a catacomb. The giveaway for its setting in time is the boy’s clothes. They are slightly reminiscent of old style stuff, but the main features are jeans and a t shirt.
You know, I could do with a second review forum for this. Could you please set one up for me? Thanks.
Ok, I’ve set up a second forum for you here, Whovian.
Thanks!
The first 3 pages thing helped. Some of my friends said it was really good and number 2 as well, adding urgency to the plot. I need help. You said keep it to 5 members by episode 5. Well, I have 25 characters. My guys don’t go around wearing costumes and some are parents, uncles, teachers, bullies, minor antagonists, as for battles and action scenes I tend to have more than one villain. For example two people might be fighting the supervillian while the others free hostages.
This series will probably be for males since it will be violent and action-packed along with some comedy and romance (although I know some girls who like DBZ). And I was thinking of including some manga style porn.
Umm, Chulance, that sounds kind of inane.
–25 characters in 5 episodes will be extremely hard to get aired/published. I’d recommend cutting down your cast of heroes dramatically. The biggest cast I can think of is Heroes, which got up to maybe 12 recurring characters after four seasons of hour-long episodes. Getting to 25 characters after 5 half-hour-long episodes sounds like a really bad idea. Viewers will not be able to keep that many characters separate and you will not have enough time to develop them.
–If your goal is getting published/aired, I think the porn has to go.