Sep 24 2008
Which Origin Stories are Plausible?
One of our Google queries today was “can radiation give you superpowers?”
No. However, if you’re writing a superhero story, that doesn’t matter! Your readers will accept that tropes like radiation can give someone superpowers, so radiation makes for a completely plausible origin story. Except for intense training, it’s not like there’s any better alternative. (In real life, one drug addict somehow enhanced his sense of smell to canine-like levels, but that only lasted for a few weeks. Also, for obvious reasons, drugs do not typically work well for superhero origin stories).
Here are some other origin stories that readers have generally come to accept.
- Cybernetics (Bionic Woman, Cyborg).
- Genetic engineering (Spiderman).
- Chemical enhancement (Green Goblin).
- Powersuits (Ironman, Steel).
- Ridiculously tough training (Batman, GI Joe).
- The hero belongs to a tougher-than-human species (Superman, possibly X-Men).
- Mutations, probably (X-Men, Heroes).
Typically, plausible origin stories tend to be scientific. Fortunately, you don’t have to have a strong grasp of scientific research to write a compelling origin story. Generally speaking, modern scientific research in fields like genetics is conducted by large teams of scientists that spend years on each project and have access to large budgets. If you’re writing a superhero story, your readers will almost always accept that a single supergenius can perform unimaginable feats of science. Reed Richards is apparently a world-class researcher in every branch of science, and he’s able to instantaneously solve problems that would probably take a real team of scientists decades.
Here are some other (incorrect) assessments of modern science that readers will usually accept.
- Superhero scientists rarely keep good notes. When the doctor that created Captain America got killed, the formula for the serum was lost forever. Whoops. In real life, researchers keep exhaustive notes so that their experiments can be replicated.
- Superhero scientists rarely fail. In real life, scientists would test hundreds of variations of a drug, which tends to make the process inordinately laborious and expensive. But readers will accept that a superscientist tends to get it right almost immediately.
- A super-scientist can accomplish anything if he’s desperate enough. Tony Stark built a powersuit in an Afghan cave and Norman Osbourne became the Green Goblin because he was willing to subject himself to premature tests.
- Even a scientifically gifted high school student can have flashes of scientific brilliance. See Peter Parker and Virgil Hawkins (Static Shock). My most profound scientific thought in high school was that I could make my paper airplanes more aerodynamic by adding flaps in the back.
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Good article. I’m usuing a combination of a bunch (mostly 5 and 6).
But I want a whole team of people, and I remember Stan Lee saying in an interview that ‘Not every Hero could be bitten by a radioactive Spider or go into space and get hit by radiation, or a burst of Gamma radiation. So that’s when he came up with X-men’s origins, by creating a whole new species and saying they all have powers, he didn’t have to explain everyone’s individual origin.
For me, I tried to think of somethin like that, what I came up with is: the past. 20, 000 years ago the earth was dominated by Super heroes who enslaved humans, but the humans rebelled and somehow won and they destroyed their history (which i think makes it more plausible, stories of Atlantis could be linked to it) then the ‘super heroes’ went into hiding and slowly emereged, inter-bred with the humans and every few hundred years the ‘super hero dna’ takes a more dominant position.
I think it’s interesting because while a hero today could have amazing powers, that doesn’t mean his son would. It could be used to explain people like Alexander the great, Hitler, Robin hood, Jesus. Plus I’ve heard (altough I don’t know if it’s true) that some genetic traits do skip generations (diseases, bladness, and I heard about white women marrying white men and having black children because her grandmother was black…although that could just be a cover story for a cheating wife.) But again, I think it’s still a plausible origin story.
Genetics is a very fertile field for the authors of superhero stories. It’s also very intuitive to readers and more relatable than magic or aliens. Another aspect I love about genetics is that there are enough real-life biological quirks that you can tailor the biology to fit your story. For example, in real-life some traits (like eye-color and a vulnerability to alcoholism) can skip generations.
Another quirk you can add is that some traits are the result of several genes, which may be a combination of dominant and recessive. If that were true for superness in your world, it would be possible for two non-super people to have a super kid or for two super people to have a non-super kid.
You left out Mystical origins i.e Dr. Strange. As long as it’s not too crazy I think it works. Dr. Strange is a really good example. Magic origins have a lot of potential and can be very diverse, but there is also a large chance of failure
Well, the title of the article was “What Origin Stories are Plausible?” By definition, a magical origin story is not plausible. Also, I’d agree with you that magical superheroes are very risky (I’d estimate they fail more than 90% of the time).
Magical heroes are harder to work with because they have to be carefully segregated from nonmagical heroes/villains. It’s almost impossible for a story to work when some characters are magical and others have more realistic origins. For example, when Spiderman does battle with a wizard or a werewolf, it will feel much hokier than if American Dragon or Sailor Moon were to do the same.
As a result, I’d say that a magical-superhero story could only succeed if it were thoroughly infused with magic, so much that the magical element affects the core audience, tone, mood, etc. In contrast, a story like Spiderman or Superman is free to use its scientific origin as a quick and disposable introduction to the story and never mention the science again. In contrast, magic is really an elephant that will constantly have the attention of the audience.
I’d also consider the audience’s age-range. If you want to sell to an audience older than 15, magical origin stories are pretty much a nonstarter. The best comparable stories I can think of are cartoon shows like Sailor Moon, American Dragon, Jackie Chan Adventures and Juniper Lee. Those cap out at about 13-15, I think. The problem is that magical origin stories don’t feel serious enough for older readers, I suspect. In the world of comic books, there are very few magical heroes with an established audience. The main examples I can think of are Dr. Strange and Zantanna. In terms of popularity and the depth of publication, they aren’t exactly A-listers. I doubt they’re even B-listers.
CAVEAT: There is a well-established audience of older readers for high-fantasy novels like Eragon. So why will the same readers that like LOTR pass on Dr. Strange? Long story. I think the main difference is that superhero stories appeal to older readers because they happen in a world very much like ours. It’s very difficult to make a magical world–even an urban fantasy–feel like ours. Similarly, space opera superhero stories are very hard to sell even though they are conceptually similar to best-selling series like Star Wars and Star Trek.
Aaaah, Scary odds. I wanted to make a magic superhero. (90% fail, that’s scary). Well Harry Potter goes a little higher than 15 years of age, and Dr. Strange at least hits 20. I think all you have to do is be a little serious in tone, but not be too strict. Adding darker elements like demons and such would probably up the age range. Now, I’m scared to write a magic hero.
Harry Potter (and other fantasy novels like LOTR) go substantially higher than 15 despite having magic. However, a magical superhero story is usually different than a fantasy story in a few important ways. Crucially, a superhero story is usually set on modern Earth. Harry Potter is also set on modern Earth, but it’s clearly more of a fantasy story than a superhero story. So it might not be very useful for determining what kind of superhero stories can work.
Yeah. I think writing a magical superhero story for older readers would be very difficult. Not impossible, though. The Dresden Files would probably be an ideal example of a sort-of-superhero that used magic. The writer tried to fit the magical hero into the “gritty private eye” subgenre, which gave the story a seriousness that tends to elude most magical superhero stories.
I have been thinking of this idea lately (it’s still vague) and decided to research how to write an effective superhero novel and I’m glad I came across this site.
My character’s name is Wes Larkin, a high school senior capable of self-propelled flight. What sort of personality is that suggesting to you guys? Anyway, his origin story goes something like this: Wes is involved in a car accident that leaves him fatally injured and comatose. At the hospital, some shady doctors/scientists experiment on him and that’s how he gets his abilities. Was thinking of adding some other abilities to flight, like super strength, speed…and maybe even energy manipulation (launching fireballs DBZ style) but I don’t know how to explain that with the genetic manipulation I have in mind.
Thinking of aiming for audiences between 16 and 24 or somewhere thereabouts. Would really like it if I got some ideas to spur me on…what other angles could I add to the story? Thinking Smallville meets Ultimate Spiderman…would that work?
Here are some thoughts, Guv.
If you’d like to explain a few other superpowers (like strength, speed and energy manipulation) you could probably handle all of that with genetic engineering. For example, you could say that the doctors spliced the kid’s genes with the genes of stronger animals to make his body produce denser and thicker muscles.
Depending on how fast you want the kid to go, you could say that the doctors genetically engineered his leg muscles and enhanced his lung capacity. Cheetahs can go 65-70 mph for short bursts, which is pretty damn fast. If you’d like to go at significantly faster speeds, it may help to make use of cybernetics. As for energy manipulation, some animals have the ability to discharge electricity (like eels and jellyfish). So you could explain the ability with genetic engineering. On the other hand, if you’d like to give your character the ability to use ridiculously large and powerful lasers (a la DBZ), cybernetics would be a more plausible alternative.
On a balancing note, I’d suggest making your character superstrong or superfast, but not both. If he is both superstrong and superfast, it will be very hard for you to challenge him. In contrast, a character that is just superstrong could have an interesting scene where he had to rescue a few hostages, for example.
I like the character’s name and I find his origin story interesting. A 16-24 audience sounds pretty doable, although typically a novel’s hero is slightly older than the readers. If it wouldn’t affect your plot very much, it may help to make him a college student. Anyway.
As for his personality, I’d recommend coming up with something that fits the story and creates a strong conflict with the villains, rather than fits his power. However, if you wanted to make a character who personified the power to fly, I imagine that he’d be some combination of idealistic, hopeful, optimistic, creative or aloof. That feels a bit cliche, but not nearly as bad as a brash-and-reckless fire elementalist.
Here are some other angles you might consider:
Thanks for the ideas, Jacob. You’ve given me some nice angles to think about.
My idea was that Wes would be chosen for the experiment due to his condition. The doctors see a good opportunity to test the extent of their genetic breakthrough; the gene splicing has worked with some earlier human tests (source of the villains?) but they were all perfectly healthy…Wes presents them with the chance for further investigation- a random shot in the dark in the name of science.
As for the villains, I’m thinking a handful will have experienced a similar origin but I don’t want to overplay that angle, so I’ll mix in some mutant villains with their own unique origins where possible but largely just regular criminals. I still have to figure out why Wes becomes a superhero (minus the tights)…was thinking I slowly work him out to picking up the superhero mantle…starts by reluctantly saving the people around him, but then starts to see his abilities as a gift, a responsibility, a duty even…he has the ability to make a difference, so why not use it?
I’m working on his personality and personal life prior to the accident. Liked the idea of his girlfriend moving on in his absence…think I’ll use that; a lot of dramatic potential. Thanks!
Hey Jacob, any feedback on my explanation for Wes becoming a superhero? Been thinking more and more about the story and I think explaining Wes and why he does what he does would go a long way in understanding him and making him more relatable…would like to hear your thoughts on my idea too, B. Mac. How could I develop it further? The creation process seems interminably tortuous…
If I had to add anything, I’d speculate that the doctors are worth developing further. There’s probably a story behind why a group of people starts doing research that could give someone superpowers. I imagine the research is secret, frustrating and possibly dangerous, so I think that I’d like to know what’s driving them. What’s the end goal– what do they hope to achieve when they have the ability to give superpowers? Are they volunteers or is someone else coercing them? Is an antagonist involved somehow?
As for the selection of Wes, the comatose teen. So your doctors have done past tests on humans and now would like to try tests on a comatose human. Why would they want to move from live to comatose humans? Perhaps the initial tests were highly dangerous and they don’t want to risk harming someone unless he’s already as-good-as-dead anyway. That’s one explanation. Another, perhaps more interesting one, is that they do not anticipate Wes waking up. Maybe these powers are TOO dangerous and they want to give them only to a coma victim because they don’t think that a coma victim will ever use them to endanger people. Then, when he wakes up, he escapes from the doctors. (Or maybe they part on better terms than that. Your call, obviously).
Perhaps the experiments and operations also risk mental damage.
What about the villains? While the doctors are interesting, usually it’s the villains that drive the story. (For example, it’s always Superman responding to Lex Luthor rather than vice versa).
Do you think people would accept mutation due to a disease as a reason for superpowers? =/
Yeah, I think so… what disease/powers did you have in mind?
The disease . . . well, it would affect 50% of the population. About 20% could contract it but survive, about 30% would die. But then a tiny fraction of the ones who contracted it and survived would get superpowers (I wasn’t planning on having physics or anything like that . . . probably the most iffy idea I had was the right-hand-heals, left-hand-kills thing).
Not sure exactly HOW the disease will give people superpowers yet, I’m still sketching out ideas really. Probably somehting like a small mutated strain (which would also explain why all of the superpowered MC’s know each other) that can kill you, but it stimulates muscle growth in some areas or . . . something.
What grade is someone in when they’re sixteen in the USA?
The tenth or eleventh grade, depends on your birthday. I’m sixteen and I’m in the 11th.
Thanks, I needed to know for my character Tristram, because he was raised in the USA and my sources tell me that your education system is different.
In the Land Down Under, we have pre primary which most of us begin at four, turning five at some point in the year. Those with birthdays in January and February are usually five before the school year begins, and are put in the same class as the four year olds, because they were born in the same year as them. We are six in year one, and we finish primary school at age twelve. Most of us enter high school at age twelve, unless our birthday is early in the year. But by the end of the year, all year eights are thirteen.
Primary School starting ages:
Year One: Aged five or if they have an early birthday, six.
Year Two: Aged six or if they have an early birthday, seven.
Year Three: Aged seven or if they have an early birthday, eight.
Year Four: Aged seven or if they have an early birthday, nine
Year Five: Aged nine or if they have an early birthday, ten.
Year Six: Aged ten or if they have an early birthday, eleven.
Year Seven: Aged eleven or if they have an early birthday, twelve.
From primary, we go directly to high school.
High School starting ages:
Year Eight: Aged twelve or if they have an early birthday, thirteen.
Year Nine: Aged thirteen or if they have an early birthday, fourteen.
Year Ten: Aged fourteen or if they have an early birthday, fifteen.
Year Eleven: Aged fifteen or if they have an early birthday, sixteen.
Year Twelve: Aged sixteen or if they have an early birthday, seventeen.
In year eleven, we get the opportunity to do work experience twice a week, if we plan on going to TAFE (Less difficult than university). It’s optional for us. Some leave during year eleven and get apprenticeships doing things like working in a garage or carpentry. Some TAFE students stay all the way through to graduation and then find courses on their own. Year eleven TEE (those who want to go to uni) students stay all the way up to graduation, and have more difficult subjects than TAFE students.
R.B., you’re 16 in the eleventh grade too? The similarities between us are starting to get creepy. It’s like we’re reflections of each other.
I’m sixteen and in Year Eleven in Britain, if that counts? D:
Haha. I guess.
Tee hee!!
There are so many 16 year olds here! It is not long until I shall join you in the land of sixteen-ity. Haha.
I’m slightly surprised that our most productive guests are high schoolers. I have a very hard-ass approach to grammar and punctuation. I would have assumed that college students and adults would be most receptive to that.
I’m not really. The “success” of Eragon is part of what spurred me on to make this. That series is pretty popular, and even got a movie, and I know I can do better than Eragon.
I just happened to stumble across this site when I was looking for lists of superpowers. I left my first comment, bad when my punctuation and grammar were atrocious, and then I got hooked. Once I realized people gave a crap about what I said, I straightened up my writing, I still struggle in both of those fields though.
I was never really interested in starting a book, but then I saw other people doing it and the envy set in (what a way to get motivated, huh?). I’ve always had alot of ideas floating in my head though, because I did want to a comic book. Then, once I saw how fun it was to write and rewrite and stuff, I began to have fun with the idea of writing a book. Then I learned that I could write a comic book script and thought, hey that’s right up my alley.
I’d like to write both a comic book script and a book, but for now I’m focused on the comic. They were my first love, and I’ve never been much of an avid reader, except for comics. Surprisingly though, I have a high reading speed and above average comprehension. I’m really surprised seeing as I’m so ditzy.
I’m grouchy because I was so jacked up on coffee and stupidity last night, I couldn’t write a coherent sentence for my script. For example, in my script I wrote this; (I don’t really know how to use this “;”, except for winking smilies).
“Ok, this panel is from Adrian’s P.O.V., but if Adrian was a bird and he could see himself standing by the stage, but it’s through his eyes so you can see the person on stage” (makes perfect since, huh, hahaha)
Allow me to rewrite now that my brain is on.
“This panel is an upwards angular shot of Adrian and the stage. Pulled back. Adrian is in the bottom left corner showing a large portion of the stage in this panel. The stage is completely clear, except for a chair in eerie spotlight.”
(Now that made since)
Somebody pointed me at this site through NaNoWriMo, and I bookmarked it for future reference. *shrug* Very boring story, really.
What about object based powers? Are they plausible for origin stories? By object based I mean Green Lantern and others like him who have their powers derived from a object.
Some objects are very plausible. For example, it’s not hard for readers to suspend their disbelief that a man in a powersuit can fly. Powersuits and cybernetics are pretty much just improved versions of what cutting-edge scientists are already working on.
In contrast, getting your power from an artifact (like Green Lantern’s ring) may feel almost like magic. From a marketing perspective, quasi-magical items could be problematic. A few magical superheroes have been very successful (namely Sailor Moon), but it’s a tricky sell outside of the anime market. I think that one of the consequences of the Marvel revolution in comics since the 1970s is that it’s very hard to sell a comic book that doesn’t pay at least lip-service to what we know of science today.
From a writing perspective, you may also have trouble making it clear to readers what a Green Lantern’s parameters, powers and limits are. Generally it’s easiest to write (or read) a story about a hero with narrow powers. In contrast, if I were describing GL’s powers to a stranger, I’d say “he can do pretty much anything with projections until his ring runs out of juice.” Fatigue is a fine limit, but his powers are very broad.
Is alien tech very plausible? For instance, in the Superman Animated Series, Superman had a phantom zone projector that allowed him to release and capture villians.
I planned on using lots of alien tech in my story as well as exosuits. However, I don’t think it’s plausible because how often do you think an alien would fly to earth and accidently leave some tech behind.
I once considered making everyone’s powers in Adrian’s story technologically based.
I’m leaning towards saying that the Superman technology is not plausible. Like Jacob said, it isn’t similar to anything in real-life. However, if you’re writing a hard sci-fi story, you could probably put together an audience of readers that wouldn’t mind. It’s a harder sell than soft sci-fi (like Spiderman or Heroes) but a story does not have to be plausible to be readable.
What do think the odds that a Wolverine meets Green Lantern type of character would make for a readable story? His powers are regenerative healing factor, energy blasts, and constructs. The origin story would be a shady, government experiment where the subject is submerged in a vat of chemicals and then bathed in radiation.
Input is badly needed!
The powers sound workable and the origin is bland but serviceable. I think the origin is considerably easier to work with than a GL-style technological artifact. What’s his personality like?
I’d recommend spicing up his origin story. I think it’s time for a fresher spin on the “chemical/genetic experiment from government goes horribly wrong (or right) origin.”
I thought about having Adrian go into some outrageously high-tech machine to get his alien DNA, but I decided against it. I think a trip to his new home planet and a shot will work. How he got his powers isn’t as important as the events leading up to it or after it, so I went minimalist on it.
I don’t know if you guys ever saw the “Batman Beyond” episode “Splicers,” but it was about this guy who created a way to bond human and animal DNA to give horns, stripes, spots, feral senses, etc. to those given a serum or combination of two different serums.
I really enjoyed the episode and was thinking about working a story from the ideas in that episode. Maybe I’ll use synthetic DNA created in a test tube along with the animal DNA.
As far as personality, I haven’t given it a whole lot of thought yet. I just came up with this guy today. At a glance I think he wouldn’t as murderous as Wolverine, but a little feral pick me up never hurt anyone.
Oh, by the way, thanks for the input. This is the first time I ever tried this, so thanks again for the support.
You’re welcome.
Even though Superhero Nation includes a government agent that is a mutant alligator, I think there’s a a discrepancy between the government conspiracy and the primal, animalistic powers. Readers have been primed to think of villainous government science as cold and sterile, I think. So the end result, a feral beast, might clash with what they thought going in.
I came up with another idea last night right after I posted my last comment. I was thinking that I could have nanites rearrange his DNA or cell structure to give his powers. That fits better in today’s “Information Age” than the “serum” stuff of the 60′s.
One major departure from the “Wolverine” origin I’m taking is to not have the mind wipe. I always thought that was a little weak myself. Also, I was going to make him a bit more of a thinker than raging beast.
Better?
I like it, great way to not be cliche. I think adding a thinker edge to a usually harder character is a fresh spin that readers could appreciate.
Ragged Boy, are you writing any stories right now?
Yeah, Renegade, I think it’s better.
I’m currently writing (more accurately, slacking off on) a comic book script about my character Adrian Gaines. He’s a poor, black, inner-city kid who dreams of becoming a big actor. Aliens invade Earth in a tournament/search and recruit humans, Adrian being recruited by Jimelly, an eccentric water alien.
The tournament goes on and like all the competitors that make it far enough Adrian’s DNA is fused with that of Jimelly’s alien race, giving him a variety of water based powers. He later becomes the superhero, Showtime. He goes on to fight villians, killer competitors, and major space baddies. I’m not sure yet about how I’m going to end the contest and let Adrian go on with superheroism as well as his acting career. But I do want to let him continue his story. I’ll work it out.
My big thing is aliens, I love them.
I also have a space opera on hold. And I’m dreaming up a weapon-based superhero team.
I hate that I haven’t been in the mind set to write. Thank god, winter break is here and I can focus on my personal preoccupations.
I love comic books and they are far less typing than a book, I hate typing. A 24 page comic book is only about 13,000 to 16,000 words as opposed to a book which is (I really can’t give a good estimate) much longer.
Hmm. I think 13,000-16,000 words might be a bit generous for a 24 page comic book. I think things might get tight if you had more than 200 words of text on a page. I’d imagine that 2,500-5,000 words would be sufficient depending on the age of your audience and how action-oriented the series is.
For example, The Watchmen was written for older readers and had more dialogue than most series. On the pages with the most words, I’m counting about 225 words. You can see what that looks like here. My impression is that 225 is a little bit crowded.
As for novels. The range of novels is very broad, but novels are typically published between 50,000-75,000 words. (However, novel manuscripts are frequently longer to compensate for what will be cut during the editing process).
Oh, I was going off a Sandman script and their very descriptive, I guess my opinion was askewed. Well, my story will probably be more actiony. so I’m leaning more towards the 5,000 end.
That was crowded! Geez Louise!
Oh, I was just talking about the 24 pages as they will actually be printed. I’m not sure how long the script is, that kind of depends on how much description you’d like to put in. I don’t know what’s typical, but Dark Horse recommends describing each panel in only a few sentences. If you have an average of 5 panels per page, that’s 120 panels. If you spent 30 words describing each panel, hmm… that’d be about 3500 words of description. Then you’d throw in the dialogue and captions (2500-5000 words?). So I’d roughly estimate 6000-8000 words, but I suppose that’s heavily based on how much description the comic book company wants to see in the script.
Yeah, I think that 225 words is usually too much text for one page. I’d be really careful going above 175, personally, particularly if the audience is young or the comic has a very action-oriented slant.
Yeah, I thought 5,000 words was abnormally low haha.
Has anyone here ever tried to take a comic and turn it into a text based story? I tried with the first couple of New Avengers issues and really enjoyed it. It helped me quite a bit to write stories with a comic book air to them.
Never tried that before. Sounds interesting. I think it’s easier because you can see what to explain and how and the dialogue is already written for you. Only thing is none of it can be original, so it can’t be sold. But, I’m sure it’s a fun exercise.
Could I read a piece?
Sure, I stored it away on a CD somewhere. I’ll find it and e-mail it to you if you send me a e-mail to reply to. My email address is the.batman@gmx.com. When you do e-mail me, let me know which you want. Ultimate X-men, New Avengers, Green Lantern, and the JLA vs. the Avengers are the ones I have worked on so far. Some of them I have not finished but I can send you what I have and give you the rest when I’m finished.
Ok, I sent it.
You know what you were saying, loads of comments back, about fantasy. Well, I’m a fantasy reader, I’m not a comic book reader, and here’s the thing – its because I don’t like books with pictures in them. However, I love superheroes. I loved Jim Butcher’s spider-man novel, and I watch all the superhero DVDs, and I go on websites like this one and read about them. I read SIWBInvincible, too.
I have friends who read fantasy and comics, and here’s the thing we agree on. For the most part, comics are too camp when it comes to magic. If you want a feel of a magic superhero, try Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, and The Dresden Files.
But if we had more, better magic writers, then we’d get second generation magic writers in a few decades, and think of the stories they would tell….
PS, Spawn is a magic super-hero, too.
Yeah, I agree that magical superheroes tend to be campy (in works aimed at older audiences, at least). Also, I don’t really understand why a magical superhero might appeal to an older reader, so it’s hard for me to read/review/write those stories.
It’s not like I read all that many nonmagical comic-books, though. At $3-4 per 24 pages, they’re well out of my price range. The dollar-to-enjoyment ratio just isn’t nearly as good as, say, a World of Warcraft subscription, or a video game, or a book, or a matinee movie ticket. (And most of those are social activities).
But I’m pretty religious about following superhero TV shows and some of the movies. They’re much cheaper and easier to get into. I also feel that TV writers have generally treated their audiences more kindly than comic book writers have. If a television show tried a “Spiderman makes a deal with the devil” kind of storyline, it would probably lose its viewership and get canceled shortly thereafter. At the very least, its audience would agree that the show had jumped the shark.
I looked up “Fonzie jumps the shark” on youtube, and it I started laughing really loud. The footage of the shark is obviously from Seaworld and it would have been so much better if it actually jumped out while he skiied over the cut off section of the ocean. Worst. Scene. Ever. I could do better than that with a camcorder and some clay. I’d make a stop-motion version of it that would completely kick the original’s arse. Now all I need is clay. And a camcorder.
I saw divers in the background. lol
Anyone know how to make a line break in Word 2007? 2007 is super weird.
Newflash: I’m finally back on the writing train. I’ll post it after I’ve fully introduced Adrian. I want to get that part just right.
I’m having trouble jamming this story into 24 pages, I’m on page 7 and Adrian hasn’t even stepped on stage yet before the gunshots. However, I have introduced the aliens (one page), the school (two page), and Adrian’s fantasy(one page).
I’ll try to pick up the pace. I suspect the event leading to the chase will go by fast.
Is it ok if I slightly extend the issue, maybe, 26-28 pages?
I hate Word 2007. I think you make linebreaks by holding shift and hitting Enter.
My guess is that going a bit over will be OK. If they’re super attached to 24 pages but liked the story anyway, the worst case scenario is that they’d ask you to publish it at 24 pages.
Me too, Word is so confusing now. I just want my 2003 back.
Yeah, I use Word 2003. I find it easier to use.
How do you get it back?
You could probably re-install an old version of Microsoft Office.
How?
I’m not sure. It might be on the internet somewhere. If not, you’ll have to ask around for an old disc.
I’ve learned that if you open an old 2003 doc in 2007 it line-breaks as normal. So you can hi-jack an old document and save it as something else.
Otherwise, there might be something in the settings of ’07 that allows line breaks. I wouldn’t know what it is, though.
You can’t go back to an older version but you can save in an older format to make it compatible with an older version of Word.
I just went through the 2007 training course, it isn’t that bad, it’s just 2003 with everything updated and switched around.
I don’t hate it anymore, I rate it pretty equal with 2003.
Hey guys, um. I just have no idea where to begin to ask for advice on a site like this! Haha… well I’m going to write up a story about superhumans and whatnot, but I feel like I should consult some experts :]
I was reading about origin stories, and I’d just like to know how plausible and effective mine is. Project: HERO is a wealthy/eccentric/bored scientist’s undertaking after the military office she works for doesn’t give her the green light to genetically enhance human beings. She and her team have an extensive qualification exam mass-distributed to schools, colleges and workplaces all over the nation disguised as aptitude tests, and interview one thousand candidates chosen for desired attributes (almost completely random or whimsical ones at that). Over time the candidates are brought in to be enhanced and then released back to their homes to be observed.
My protagonist isn’t the brightest or the most ambitious or the strongest; he’s actually a control in the experiment, chosen because of his average intelligence and low social profile. Like many other participants, he goes right back home and resumes a normal, if slightly enhanced, life.
After one of the candidates tracks and kills each of the scientists involved in the experiment however, he accesses the files on the superhumans and begins to hunt them down, resolving to be the only one left alive with this kind of power. When my boy’s house is blown up, he has to run like hell and try to find safety with a skilled and determined super-murderer hot on his trail.
Your MC seems a lot like a chosen one. He was picked by this test for purposefully for being average. How is he able to survive, then, against someone who (from the sounds of things) is much stronger than him? Why does this person want to be the only one with these powers?
Your idea is a good one (I like that he’s trying to look after himself, not be a superhero) but I think there are some areas that could use a little tweaking. The military-genetics-project angle seems to have been done a lot, for example. Also, I’m not sure what to make of this scientist. Props for making her female, though.
I’m trying to keep him a bit low-key in the natural talents department so as to have someone who relates more to average Joes than does the average superhuman (who in my story is an intelligent, accomplished, and otherwise qualified person). How should I rearrange it so that he isn’t so… chosen, but remains a viable underdog in an exam where usually the best are chosen?
Hehe, that’s my main problem, trying to come up with a way to create superheroes without resorting to genetics or the military. XD Do you have any suggestions that would influence a wide range of people? I thought comet-landing causing radiation, but that’s too localised… and individual stories like Spidey’s being bitten seem tedious, plus I want something that connects them all together.
And the villain is a bit complicated, but I’ll give the short and dirty version: intelligent but insecure guy thinks he’s God’s gift to mankind, machine-thingy gives villain semi-lame powers (invisibility or regeneration as opposed to super-strength or telekinesis), guy exploits his powers a bit but is STOPPED by random superhero #1, resulting in the conclusion that superhumans and people with knowledge of the project are the only ones who can stop him from… doing what he wants to (he’s got a smidge of megalomania, not sure whether he wants to rule the world or not yet). So he jumps town and begins his jealous killing spree.
I think something man-made would make the story click best. (It’d be too hard to have your killer candidate go on a targeted killing spree if the origin was something as chaotic and unorganized as a meteor shower). Your scientists might be working on something like a generic chemical enhancement to cure something like cerebral palsy or muscular dystrophy. (If that’s the case, it would make sense if at least some of the test subjects, including the hero, are picked because they’re a bit scrawny).
You could possibly work in the element of unforeseen consequences here, which would help reinforce that the scientists are really in over their heads. For example, in real life Viagra was originally intended to cure hypertension. Preliminary tests on humans indicated it was not effective, but when the scientists tried to call off the tests the test-subjects refused to hand over the remainder of their prescriptions. Heh heh. That’s how Pfizer discovered what Viagra actually does. Similarly, I’d recommend having your scientists belatedly discover that they’ve actually given a bunch of people superpowers.
I agree that the hero might be a bit of a chosen one, which is a character that gets lucky breaks rather than one that makes his own destiny. However, I think it’s accepted for each comic book to start the book with one lucky accident. For example, Spiderman is hugely lucky to be the one person in the room that gets bitten by the spider, but aside from that he’s not particularly lucky. So, I think your lucky accident would be that the hero is one of many normal (or kind-of-normal) people that gets selected for this super-experiment. After that, he should drive the story himself rather than rely on coincidence or luck. For example, why does the killer fail to kill him the first time around? It should be because of something about the hero’s personality or traits.
Plotwise, I’m not sure about the “boy on the run from a killer” plot. I suspect it will be hard to develop. In which directions could you take the plot? The only way I could see the plot developing is that the hero masters his abilities, possibly becomes a superhero himself, and finally defeats the villain. The End. That might be enough to start a comic book series, but it’s probably not enough for a novel. (Which one are you trying to write?)
In contrast, I think we use a similar idea to launch a more fertile plot. The initiating event of our novel is that the main character nearly gets murdered. (See page 2 of the comic book version here). From there, the main development is that he gets transferred away from his happy IRS job to an exceedingly wacky and violent superagency. I think this gives me a lot of room to develop the character and the plot.
–How does he grow as a member of his new team?
–Who else is on the team? What are they like?
–How does the hero get along with his teammates?
–What does the hero think of his job? Of his boss?
–Does the hero eventually have to do something very foreign to him, like killing a criminal? How does he react to that?
–When the original assassins have finally been stopped at the end of the book, what’s the conclusion? Does he try to go back to the IRS? Will the IRS even take him?
You may be able to expand your plot by working in some new characters and maybe some intermediate goals. For example, as soon as the character survives the near-assassination, I think that would be a good opportunity for him to try to find other people that were involved with the experiment. If the final goal of your book is to stop the killer candidate, then you’d probably want to give them an intermediate goal. (For example, in our book the intermediate goal is joining the wacky superagency as a temporary solution to avoid getting killed). This will give them something to accomplish without exhausting the primary plot too quickly. I think an intermediate goal that makes sense would be getting other test-subjects to band together before they all get killed. Do you think that might work for you?
Woah sorry I was in Vegas… :]
I like that idea! The one about the cure for a common ailment or problem, and the unexpected consequence… Gracias mucho!
Hmm… I kind of had in mind the guy just headin’ into his apartment after a long night at the joint he works at before his room blows up, and fortunately he’s on the toilet…
So should his survival be in his hands instead, so he isn’t so much of a lucky breaks kind of guy?
Haha I didn’t mention the subplots, but B.Mac you took one right outta my mind: after leaving a few homes (or shelters), he comes across a few superhumans who’ve come in contact with each other and have formed a group. Unfortunately in my head they were all killed as a consequence of being near the killer’s current target… or maybe not all… my head still spins, thinking too far ahead.
It would motivate him to take action against his enemy, losing friends and realizing that no matter what this guy will not rest until one or the other is dead. Or should I take another direction with the supergroup? Should he become a superhero? Should the group try to find the others and kill this hunter together?
I don’t think my guy will ever master his powers. :[
But if he doesn’t it’d be fine, I think if he survives he’d have other opportunities. I’m using this plot mainly as a ‘pilot episode’ to introduce a superhero universe. It wouldn’t be a comic series, and it certainly wouldn’t be a novel… more like a long-short story.
Oh, important! Should I kill my villain? I was thinking he doesn’t die but my hero survives and escapes into an uncertain future, or finds some peace… How do I do it? Should he be defeated and spared? Dropped into a ‘bottomless’ pit only to survive? Jailed and paroled for super-good behaviour? Earn a grudging respect for my hero and resolve to retreat to return another day?
It’s actually muchos gracias… not the other way around.
I have a few observations…
–Short stories are a bit unusual here (I think you’re the first short-story author here), so we might have trouble offering advice related to pacing and plot-length. How long are you thinking of going to? (5K or 10K or 25K words, etc?) I’d recommend going to at least 10-15,000 words because I think that action-based short-stories kind of need the room.
–Unless your story is totally meant as a comedy, I think that surviving the attack because he’s in the bathroom is a lucky break that will probably make the hero seem less impressive than he could be. It could be comic, but it wouldn’t be much of an action sequence. I’d recommend having him survive because of something he does. For example, he might be quick-witted, tricky, resilient, etc.
–I don’t recommend introducing the element of superheroes in this story. It kind of seems like a red herring and a short-story doesn’t have space to waste. I think their main objective should be killing the villain.
–If this is a short story under 15,000 words, I think it would really help to kill him. It’s the quickest and most concrete way to bring resolution at the end. However, if the story is longer (more of a novella), then I think the story has more room to play around with a more ambiguous ending (one that leaves him alive). Defeating him and sparing him would be an interesting moral twist, but the story isn’t over until he’s either dead, converted or crippled. Converting him into a nonkiller would probably feel cheesy in a short story. Crippling him might just mean taking his powers away and leaving him to the cops. That could work, but I’d recommend having the police be kind of clueless about the superpowers throughout the story.
You made me look up novella, haha, and I think that’s the best word to describe the length I’m shooting for. I agree, I probably won’t introduce superhero concepts too much in my first story; I’m planning that kind of thing in later serials.
Ok, so how ’bout this. Steven stumbles into his apartment, bushed after a day of work, when he picks up the faint smell of gas. Upon straining his ears he can hear the slight hissing of his stove going off, and takes a step toward the kitchen. The ignitors are triggered and a fireball erupts in the kitchen and expands to fill the entire room, but my boy is quick enough to open a door and slam it shut behind him. He’s got splinters all over, and he’s bruised, but alive and able enough to crawl out and get the hell out of dodge.
A novella sounds good.
I like your scenario. I’d recommend a minor tweak. Right now, it seems like he survives mainly because he’s fast enough to escape the fireball by slamming a door behind him. It might be more interesting if we saw more about his personality and intellect. For example, he might notice that something’s distinctly wrong even before the fireball erupts.
Some examples:
—He’s got a great memory: “The oven’s on, but I didn’t have it on today.”
—He’s lazy: “The oven’s on, but I haven’t cooked in years!”
—He’s very perceptive: “The oven’s on now, but I didn’t turn it on. That would explain what that thumping upstairs was an hour ago.”
—He’s very analytical: “The oven’s on now, but I didn’t turn it on. It seems like a very strange thing for a burglar to play around with. I should probably get out of here.”
Gracias for all the help! I’ve developed a great start to what I hope will be an entertaining and enjoyable story!
Good job. Let me know if you’d like any reviews.
T-Pain, I’m sure you got enough help, but if you’re still looking for some on the ‘apartment scene’ I would suggest that when he walks in (as B.Mac said) he notices something out of place. I’d suggest he sees some magazines or something on the floor that wasn’t there when he left. THEN he notices/hears the gas from the stove. (I think it’s more difficult to hear the hissing of gas, but it’s pretty noticeable if your floor is covered with stuff that wasn’t there before. Which would then cause you to look around for any other ‘disturbances’ i.e. the gas). Then you could have your character run into the bathroom and jump into the bathtub (you mentioned he was originally going to be on the toilet, so this keeps him in the bathroom) Maybe this guy is smart and he knows that the old styled bathtub (the one with the legs) that he has always hated, is stronger then the newer cheap models (this was used in one of the Lethal Weapons, right?) So he jumps in the tub just as the kitchen blows up.
So with all that it gives you Shock (at the disturbed magazines) Fear (from the gas) Resourcefulness (jumping in the tub) and then maybe add some smart ass comment as he emerges from the tub.
Ok, I think I’ve come up with a good way for my hero to get his powers.
My physics teacher was just explaining to us that microscopic objects from space pass through our body all the time without harming us because they are so small they fit through the gaps created by our electrons and what not. Well, I was thinking “what if they didn’t just pass through our bodies, what if they affected us in some way?” That’s when I thought that maybe a wave of radiation of alien origin struck the earth, passing through the bodies of some people(and maybe some animals/plants) but instead of passing right through us, they stuck to the atoms in our bodies changing the molecular structures in our bodies.
I don’t really understand the whole process myself, but if I ran it by my physics teacher I’m sure he can explain the gist of it so I can briefly explain it in my story.
Anyways, what do you think? Sound good?
Plausibility, not so sure, just because of the fact that there are alien origin to the mutation, and aliens aren’t real. But origin-wise, it’s delightfully fresh. I suspect readers will find that interesting. It’s similar to mine, but mine works through an injection and is intentional, but they still get a blast of alien DNA.
Horray for aliens!!!
I think that for the purposes of your story, it might help if there were a good reason why it only affected some people and not others. Also, if you’re willing to use alien radiation (which sounds a bit like cosmic energy), you could just say that the radiation causes some humans to exhibit strange symptoms or mutate.
What do you think?
well i can help with that why not it only affects a ceirten blood type or something in ceirten DNA strands or people with weak imune syestems so maby people with say the Aids or HIV virues or something the blood thing might work well
Well I was going to have the blast hit a certain area, so just the people in the surrounding are or who are immediately exposed to the radiation are affected.
OK. A limit by area sounds workable. Would it affect everyone in the area?
Yes, that’s what I’m leaning towards.
Now I need to come up with a name for my two main characters.
If I use gene splicing to explain the origins of a chracters abilities…would the character have to resemble the animal used to grant the hero abilities?
I think they would have to resemble them. We haven’t covered genetics in my bio class yet and even then we won’t go in depth, but I’m pretty sure they’d have to look similar.
It isn’t just genetics that grant animals their abilities. Cheetahs have strong leg muscles for them to run fast and it also comes down to the workings of the brain. Humans can type and grasp things because we have the mental capacity to do so. If we were to somehow transplant a cat’s brain into a human, it would try to pop out claws that don’t exist.
I don’t think so, Chi. Rho. Animal DNA can be spliced with plants to create, for example, corn that glows in the dark like jellyfish.
You’re right. Meh, I never was much good with the genetic side of bio anyway. Natural selection and evolution is more my area.
I have an origin story in mind that I wanted an opinion on, but I’m uncomfortable posting it here for all to see. Would it be alright to email you about it instead?
By all means. Superheronation-at-gmail-dot-com.
I am trying to create a hero who receives his powers by spirits entering his body. The story has a lot of heaven, hell and religious overtones. So I’m wondering if that’s too into the magic or if the religion brings relevance to the story. And raises the age level?
It sounds like it fits your story. If the story has a lot of supernatural elements like heaven and hell, I think something spiritual would make for a fine origin story.
At least in the US (and probably Europe as well), a spiritual origin story would probably not raise the age level at all. On the other hand, if you’re looking at selling this story in a country with a more traditionalist approach to religion, I suspect that including religious elements may make the work feel more mature and/or controversial. You’d probably have a better feel for your home market than I would.
Religion will probably suit the story well, but magic would work too. It is possible to write about spirits and related powers without religion. For example, one of my characters can summon ghosts, tell when someone is about to die, feel the emotions of dead people, tell how and when they died and use residual emotions as a form of transport. He has a reliquary to help him with a couple of these powers. There are no religious themes in my story at all.
A problem with religion based stories are that they can seem preachy. Unless someone is a priest or over-the-top religious person, they’re not going to want to hear “God is great” every time they read a chapter. Having the religion as a less obvious factor (like in Narnia, for example) will probably be a better option.
I don’t think religion would raise the age of your target audience. The whole plot of the Lion, Witch and the Wardrobe is an allegory for the story of Jesus, and it’s a children’s book. Harry Potter on the other hand, has a big teenage audience, but younger people read it too. It really depends on the plot and age of the character. If there is going to be a lot of violence, crude humour and big words, I’d say your age range would be higher. If not, it would be more suitable for children. If your main character is a teen, your target audience would likely be teens. If he’s an adult, they’d most likely be adults.
By the way, I like your premise.
To help you out more, here are some questions:
1. Are you writing a novel or comic book?
2. What is the main character’s name?
3. How old is he?
4. Does he have a secret identity?
5. What problems will he face?
6. What is his personality?
7. What happens in the story?
I’m going for this: I want to analyze the morals of what my hero does, the weight of his decisions, why he is who he is and where that takes him.
Here’s my plan for Cable’s origin story.
His mother was a scientist. She was working on a top secret government project in the USA, developing a bomb that would cause a whole room to be frozen in an instant. This is a better alternative than an explosive bomb, as the room is not actually destroyed and any items of value can be recovered after the frozen bodies are removed. (If there was a McGuffin of Extreme Plot Value in the room, its thieves could be killed without risk to the recovery team and the McGuffin would be unharmed).
Cable’s mum was tinkering around with the bomb when it exploded. Luckily it wasn’t complete, so there was just a momentary blast of the freezing agent, but not enough to instantly kill her. She reported the accident, passed a physical and got back to work.
The freezing agent affected her unborn son, and when she had him eight months later, he showed an array of powers linked to the freezing agent in his cells. It replenishes its supply as he uses it, because his cells make it like they make biological chemicals (amino acids, lipids etc).
His mother got really ill because the freezing agent slowly killed her cells (Cable was still developing, so it just mixed with his DNA), but she was able to sign papers that allowed Cable to be adopted before she finally died. Her death was officially ruled a suicide as a cover-up.
I think it’s kind of dumb, but hey, Peter Parker was bitten by a spider! I don’t know what was in that thing, but I didn’t start crawling walls when I was bitten a couple of years ago. I’m going to try it now.
THUD! I guess I don’t need to tell you that my wall-crawling efforts didn’t work.
I like that origin story better than Isaac’s.
Peter was bitten by a genetically-altered radioactive super-spider, not a common one. It was one of 15, I think. And it escaped from its case.
I like Cable’s origin better too. Isaac’s is one of the few things I haven’t changed from my original idea. I’m dead set on him coming from a parallel universe via a transporter, but other than that I have no ideas to make it more interesting until his parents’ story is told. (Don’t worry! They’re not noble or powerful, and they don’t have an awesome weapon, time travelling machine or other cool device that makes them the coolest parents ever.)
How the heck did they make the spider radioactive without killing it? Shouldn’t it have killed Peter when he was bitten?
I believe the spiders’ DNA was made of phlebotinum, which made the spiders themselve radioactive. (My view of it is that the spider DNA created some sort of toxin or catalyst that attached itself to the editing catalysts of human DNA via blood transfer, and began to blend the two strands together– kinda like how cancer works, only, instead of destroying cells, it just added to them).
/:-\
You’re thinking of bees, I think. Spiders don’t die when they bite something.
My characters origin story is just that he evolved and gained the ability to manipulate energy in certain ways. Also, I have more than one superpowered person but my main character can absorb others powers and use them.
He has unsure morals, too.
What do you need advice on?
Seems pretty solid to me. You might have to explain how evolution led to superpowers, but that’s about it.
Okay well there appears to be another Tom now, so just to clarify I’m the Tom working on Psykid. I would change the name but since it’s an official login name as opposed to something you just type in the text field I can’t.
Anyway, about Spider-Man’s origin. Remember Spider-Man was made at a time when nuclear energy was the ‘in-thing’. People were obsessed with it, it was the ‘fuel of the future’, and it could do anything, since no one knew quite what it could do. Back when Spider-Man was made it made perfect sense that an irradiated spider could give amazing spider-powers to someone.
Of course in this day and age that doesn’t quite cut it. We know now radiation exposure can be lethal, and can’t give you amqazing spider powers. Also, the nuclear energy hype has died down completely. So, when the film version came out, the ‘irradiated’ spider became a ‘genetically altered’ spider. Much more sense scientifically. This also happened in the Spectacular Spider-Man TV show. I don’t think Stan Lee would disapprove of this, it’s more scientifically… well… possible!
I see that, Tom. Umm, I think I can change your name, if you’d like. I would have just changed his comment tag to US Tom (in contrast to the UK Tom), but it turns out that he is also from the UK. Gah! I’ve had quite enough of this tomfoolery.
As for scientific origins. Genetic engineering is making enormous strides, and I think that the average 20-something can believe that pretty much anything will be possible within twenty years. So I think that GE fits in quite plausibly into a superhero origin story. (Well, as plausible as any origin story can be). Cybernetics is also progressing quite rapidly, although we’re still pretty much stuck on reconstructive prosthetics so far. (Give it a decade, I think).
You can change my name to Tom R if you like, my second name begins with R.
Ack. I’m looking in my control panel and it says that I can’t change user-names, even my own. What the fo!
I’ll just make my name tom 2
Alright, I am new to this site, and yeah, I really need a bit of help. My country has no comic books until now. Yes, no superhero comics. I wanna make my own…
You people were talking about origin stories. Well, I had this story,a nd the origin is so new and so true that it is possible. And maybe somewhere around the world it happens.
I am from southeast Asia. So, people out there, my Asian briggaz holla at me. I need your help. And, yeah, well, you might like my origin.
I need some sketching partner and a story writer too. And yeah, if you want, your own heroes will come out from the origin I am making.
My origin isn’t anything like mutation, radiation, son of an alien… it’s totally basic and almost possible. I’ve been a comic fan and mostly believe in “reality” So you can say my story is gonna feel really real!
I need a sketching partner, so if you’re into making comics or are from Asia, holla at me! Please send me a message at mc.friday-at-gmail-dot-com .
Hi, Friday. Since you’d like artistic help, could you describe what artistic style you’re looking for? (I don’t think that we have very many artists here, but it’s worth a shot).
Worth a shot, indeed. I’m an artist– but I can’t promise miracles. But do share the art style you have in mind.
Question: what about a mythological origin? That worked with Wonder Woman because she was an Amazon.
However, with my hero, she’s a mortal but she gains her powers from goddesses. Is that too cliche?
not really i mean im useing mythologicel creatchers so should be gd
Well, mythological/magical origins are a slightly tougher sell, I think. Heroes like Wonder Woman, Thor, Dr. Strange and Zantanna aren’t all that popular.
I think it depends on the audience, though. Anime audiences seem more receptive to magical heroes (Sailor Moon, Clow Captor Sakura). But otherwise, I think magical superheroes have trouble appealing to viewers/readers older than 13. (Jake Long, etc).
NOTE: This only applies to superhero stories, not fantasy. Older readers can appreciate magic in books like Harry Potter or LOTR but they tend to pass on magical superheroes outside of anime.
just as long as you use the same mythos (greek,egypt, etc). Mixing them could be problematic. Also, messing up details would cause problems.
not always i mean iv taken alot of the bits of a Banshee i got from books and wikipedia and changed some other detaisl to manage to story and i have also slightly mixed up the people
its mostly celte belvies but iv got viken belives and such
Well, mythological origins certainly aren’t very plausible. In fact, aren’t myths interesting because they’re implausible? I’m not saying that a mythological can’t be interesting, but I highly doubt the plausibility.
Oops, I meant “aren’t” very plausible.
any legend or myth is based on something i find mytholagy intresting just depends on the person
Personally I’m a mythology buff. Which is good, considering how EVERY SINGLE COMIC Superhero in the history of mankind has, at one point in their career, encountered some kind of mythological being. Basically this trope:
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/FantasyKitchenSink
I think comic book writers like mythology so much because they feature cool characters, interesting monsters, great stories and are totally, 100% public domain. Nobody’s going to sue Marvel for naming a superhero Thor. But at the same time, by naming him Thor, they have a ready-made mythology set up and didn’t have to think of anything for themselves.
I admit myself to falling prey to this. With not one, but two mythologies, Greek and Norse.
Most readers have more difficulty suspending their disbelief for a magical or mythological hero than one who relies on super-training (like Batman) or a sci-fi explanation (like Spiderman).
Really? That’s interesting. I would’ve thought magic wouldn’t make suspension more difficult than sci-fi.
I think readers will easily accept light sci-fi (genetic engineering, cybernetics, radioactivity, nanotech, mechanical assistance, etc). Hard sci-fi (alien technology and magic-like technology) is probably as hard to believe as mythology and magic.
Hmm. Is it absolutely neccesary to go into the origin of powers in a superhero novel? Could I just ignore it and concentrate on the actual story instead? Or would it require at least a hand-wave?
I ask because in a superhero novel I’m thinking about, the main characters have abilities that are pretty different (ranging from spiritual/ESP stuff to super-durability and reflexes).
It’s worth a brief mention. It doesn’t have to be explicitly shown but a short explanation as to how this guy got ESP would be good.
I’d recommend providing at least a line or two about the character’s origin story. Readers will feel that the hero is much, much easier to understand if they know where his powers came from. I learned that the hard way.
For one of my writing classes, I did a one-shot about Berkeley/Catastrophe and Jacob. The story begins with Berkeley discovering that he has turned into Catastrophe without any explanation. (He can’t remember what happened). Thirty pages later, in the climax, he puts it together. My readers felt overwhelmingly lost. The point I took away is that readers really like to know where the hero’s unusual aspects come from. For a superhero, that’s at least his superpowers and possibly his personality. The more supernatural the story, the more readers will want to know what happened. If someone has Batman-like powers, you could probably avoid his origin if you wanted. However, if he has ESP, I think it needs at least a mass-origin story. (She’s a mutant, for example).
Here’s a sample scene I’m pondering.
CAPTAIN CARNAGE, to AGENT BLACK: Grim Trigger controls radiation.
GRIM TRIGGER: Reactor meltdown.
CAPTAIN CARNAGE: … and Mike melts minds…
MIKE: Golfing during a thunderstorm.
CAPTAIN CARNAGE: … and you’ve already met Agent Orange.
AGENT ORANGE: Superior training and conditioning.
*Everyone stares at him– no one thinks a mutant alligator’s powers really came from training.*
AGENT ORANGE: The chemical spill didn’t hurt, either.
I like that scene! I guess I see your point. Darn. I guess I’ll have to handwave it.
I’ve been thinking about making a dark hero. He looks more like a villain but is actually the hero.
He uses dark powers. I just don’t know how he would come to get his powers. Any advice?
The Hood killed a demon and stole a magical artifact…
Guyver Project used sadistic sci-fi experiments…
Ghost Rider made a deal with the devil…
Marcus (Terminator 4 spoiler) is a cyborg made by Skynet to be a Trojan Horse.
I think that’s a pretty good sample of dark origin stories. I think the trick is adding an element of bad intentions or sinisterness. Free will often factors more strongly into an antiheroic origin story than a heroic one. For example, Marcus fights against his programming, which is designed to make him kill John Connor. The free will makes the character. In contrast, it probably wouldn’t have worked to have had the Resistance create a robot and force him to be a good guy. An unthinking, unwilling Stepford Wife couldn’t make much of a protagonist.
cool thanks i also wanted to make him have a struggle with his powers.like when the johnny blaze turns into the ghost rider id like my hero to have a hard time transforming back to his human self and a hard time controling his powers.also when he uses his powers it weakins him.does that sound like a good idea?
How do you guys feel about this;
A priest from a secretive religious order is handpicked by his church to defend a collection of dimensional worlds against threats of a superhuman or supernatural origin.
^That seems rather fresh. I haven’t heard of anything like that. Though developing the religious order is a potential minefield; too many people may think that your drawing allusions to other religions. Got to be careful there.
Otherwise I like it.
Defend a collection of dimensional worlds?
What is the objective of this superhuman? What are his powers?
Does the main character have any powers?
The reason I’m asking this is because a story – a bestseller story – exists with this concept, though it isn’t said to be a religious order. The group, named the Travelers, combats a character named Saint Dane over 10 different dimensional worlds.
The Travelers are indeed secretive, and they do reflect religion, as does Saint Dane.
The book is named Pendragon, you should try looking it up. Then again, that was a short description you made; I suppose there must be more to it.
Ah, and the first ‘question’ wasn’t supposed to be a question >_>
insted of a religuies group you could still have a secret orginasation called the DPA “Dimension Protection Agency” traveling t each dimension via device called an MDH “Multiple Dimension hopper” to add some urgencay to the plot you could have that the people visiting the dimension can only stay there for a limited time and you could say this is becaue
i dimensions like a huge body and we’re forigin invaders so after a while that dimension will become imune to us and wipe of from exsistince
wat do you think?
Well, his name is Gary Ross, a young priest that was recruited after the previous priest left when his mentor Alvin Drake was murdered by a vampire (Drake was the founder of the Sagittarius Order). Ross was given an ancient amulet, called the Artisan, and it gave him the abilities to open dimensional passageways, a degree of abnormal strength, and can project bolts of mystical energy from his hands.
Hmm, that sounds pretty interesting. I will give it some consideration.
This article was pretty good.
But I also need some tips on writing a good origin story for an evil organization.
Well, I dont know how plausible it is But I enjoyed Ras AL Ghuls organization from Batman Begins.It had roots that went back decades and They were a group of infiltrators.
If you want something more realistic look at the origins of the Nazi Party but it wasnt a clandestine organization.
Is that you want ?
a secret organization that is considered a myth?
yes exactly.
Superbeing origins are pretty much the same in the story I’m writing, though superbeings aren’t created in groups. The majority of superheroes are a type of creature called an “anti-zombie” because they need Necros to survive. Zombies need Prana. They’re truly alive, cannot be controlled by necromancers, retain all the dexterity and speed of a human and look about the same as they did before changing. If anyone wants me to explain further, I will, but only then. The majority of villians are zombies who have souls. The mixture of human ethics and a zombie’s hunger generally drives them to insanity.
An anti-zombie (if someone can think of a better word, feel free to offer) is created when a human is bitten by a zombie, but the infection doesn’t reach the brain. This occurs when the only bite(s) are located on extremeties.
I actually think Necro is a good name for the race of anti-zombies.
I agree with Ragged Boy.
If you want to write about an evil organization, you could try reading up on the origins of some real world groups like the Nazis, Italian Fascist party, Al Queda, the Taliban, etc. They usually pop up when there is great economic turmoil and social unrest.
What can be a good origin for a guy who can manipulate colors & ink?
B. Mac, so I haven’t gotten any writing done lately, mostly because of college and life. However, I have been thinking about my story from time to time, and I’m beginning to doubt its plausiblity. How plausible does a story have to be for it to still be taken seriously? I guess my real problem is that I read other peoples’ origin stories and they just seem so much better than my own. So I suppose I just want some reasurrance that my origin story isn’t as dumb as I think it is and that I am not completely wasting my time with this story. I do understand that the premise of my story could be good and the final product could still suck, but I would hate for it to be the other way around and start with a crappy premise.
“How plausible does a story have to be for it to still be taken seriously?” You might like this article.
As long as the story feels consistent, I don’t think it’ll be much of a problem. Readers and publishers definitely wouldn’t pass on a fantasy novel because it had elves and dragons. But fitting elves and dragons into a superhero story with a cyborg protagonist might raise problems because it blurs genre lines and might make the story feel muddled. The readers that want to read urban fantasy might not like science fiction, and vice versa. Even if a reader did enjoy reading both genres, he might find the mix tacky. I can’t remember the last time someone wished that Spiderman got more chances to fight werewolves (Harry Osborne), vampires (Morbius) or wizards. His story is usually light science fiction and adding magical elements clashes badly with that.
Conversely, you might be able to sell urban fantasy–like a superhero story where pretty much every hero and villain had either magical origins or something generic (like Training from Hell). It’s worked for Sailor Moon, Hellboy, Bleach, Spawn (as far as I know), American Dragon, Constantine, etc. I don’t think that American comic book readers are generally as receptive to magical stories as Japanese ones are, but I think you could find a publisher that’d be willing to work with it. (American novel readers are much more amenable to fantasy–different audience demographics).
I hope that helps! Please let me know if I can offer any other suggestions.
B. Mac,
Thanks for the fast reply. Your comment was very helpful and encouraging.
I get notified whenever “B. Mac” comes up in a comment. So, if I’m online at a particular moment, it’s not difficult for me to respond quickly.
Ok B. Mac. I think I read into your last comment a little to much, but it was kinda loaded.
I’d love to help, Ghost. I’m intrigued to hear what the actual origin story is. Are you comfortable with telling us?
Haha, don’t worry. In my original comment, I was trying to make a joke and sometimes it doesn’t work. I’m sorry if it gave the wrong impression.
Sorry for taking so long to reply, Ragged Boy. The basic premise of my story is that the characters are accidentally exposed to experimental nanotechnology. When the nanotech is accidentally released during a theft, the government drops a bomb in order to prevent the tech from spreading. However, there are several survivors to the “terrorist attack” and several of them were infected with the nano tech.
Right now, their powers are just enhancements to their natural abilities (like strength, reflexes, speed, senses, intelligence and bone density). I kind of want to limit my power base form my characters instead of make the nanotech a cause for any possible power like telepathy, flight, energy projection and time travel. However, I am still deciding on things like electrical discharge, physical transformation (possibly something along the same lines as Dean Koontz’s Midnight), and physical manifestations of the nano tech. In the end though, I haven’t nailed down the limits of the abilities I am going to attribute to the nanotech, so I’m still open to suggestions.
By the way, B. Mac… just so you know, I was not offended by your comment, and after six years in your army I probably read more into your comment than what you probably meant.
Hello Ghost,
I like Nanotechnology as an origin story. I find it distinctly fresher among sci-fi origin stories. It also have a lot of room for creativity. Nice shot! I have a few concerns:
” I kind of want to limit my power base form my characters instead of make the nano tech a catch all cause for every possible power like telepathy, flight, energy projection, time travel.”
- This sentence was very confusing, so much so that I couldn’t edit it. Could you please rephrase this?
- Why does the government take such extreme measures to ensure that the technology doesn’t spread? Why is the technology a threat? Also, why did the government not try and quarantine the spread instead of eradicating it?
- Is the government the villain in your story?
- Also, if you’re planning on getting published I’d recommend that you up your clarity and overall mechanical writing ability. Unprofessional writing ability can easily be the bane of one’s writing career.
Ragged boy,
first off I would like to say sorry for the confusing post. I am out of town right now, and I am posting from my phone so that is causing some of the difficulty with my spelling and grammer. So what I was trying to say in as little words as possible is that I do not want my origin story to end up like the xmen were mutation explains all sort of outlandish abilities. I want characters abilities to reasonibly fit their origins. As far as the government’s reaction, the nano tech is self replicating, adaptable, and semi-organic. In essence, the nano tech is a man made organism with no natural pedator and as such is an enviromental disaster wanting to happen.
Here’s a relatively creative idea. If the nanotech only gives you enhanced abilities and no negative effects why wouldn’t the government want it to spread. Wouldn’t adaptable human beings be better for society. Not only would people have a survivalist edge, but their abilities would allow them to foster a better future faster. Of course, that’s not taking into account the fact that not everyone would have the best intention for their powers.
So you’re saying that if a character is a track star that they would end up with enhanced speed? That sort of thing?
I think it makes sense that a government would want to keep the nanotech from spreading. Letting the nanotech go loose could be catastrophic, but killing everybody involved probably reduces the risk of catastrophe. I think that gives you a lot of leeway, whether you’d like to portray the government here as a major villain, an anti-villain, or perhaps something more positive.
Do you have any chapters ready?
Ragged Boy,
I never said the nanotech did not have any negative effects, I just did not mention them yet because we were talking about how plausible my origin story was. So to answer both your question I think I should explain the fiction history behind the nanotech. It was orginal part of an experimental project run by DARPA (the Defense Advanced Research Programs Agency), and was the culimation of several previous DARPA programs involving nano-manufacturing, robotics, and artificial intelligence . Codenamed Project COLONY, the programs goal was to create nano robots capable of working in unison over a mirco neural network. In essense the nanites are a hive mind intellegence where each individual nanite is dumb but together they can solve complex problems and preform complex tasks (imagine if all the cells in a human brain could moved autonomously from one another but still work together). However, the downside to this method of programming the nanites meant the every colony of nanites had to be taught, much like a human child, to do more complex tasks. This meant that each colony was highly adaptable and capable of evolving.
While this meant that the nanites were capable of surviving in almost any environment (including the human body), it also meant that they were every had to destory once they had adapted to that environment. At the end of the project it was decided that due to the nanites simple yet highly adaptable nature they were to difficult to control. So if released into the world at large they might continue to evolves unchecked and posed a threat to the environment or the human race. From a strategic stand point the nanites are similar to a nuclear bomb, to dangerous to give to the general population or to fall into the hands of a possible enemy.
Well I hope that answers your questions Ragged Boy, if not just let me know and I will try to clear the matter up more for you.
Ok sorry I forgot to answer the last part of your post Ragged boy. So the nanotech basically improves on human body by augmenting it natural structure. So to increace strength the nanites would replace the damaged muscle that results from working out with nanotubes (composed of the nanites themselves). Or to increase reflexes and overall speed the nanotech would bridge the gaps between the cells in the nervous system in order to past the electrical impluse along more quickly.
These affects would work on anyone, but of course the enhancements would be greater in an olympian than the average person. However the nanotech does not always meld perfectly with its host. So in the case of it augmenting the nervous system, the nanotech might need producing effects that are more like parkinson’s disease than super reflexes, or instead of increasing someone’s eyesight, the nanotech would make them go blind.
So, these nanites are sort of semi-sentient, right? Can I ask why they are altering people like this, or even inhabiting the bodies in the first place? I mean, do the nanites need a “host”, or do they want to hide from the government and have freedom, or what?
So first off I would like to say “Yay”, because I am finally home and don’t have to post comments from my cell phone any longer.
Holliequ,
The answer to your first question is no. While the nanites’ behaviors and ability to adapt might make them appear to be sentient, they are really no more sentient than insects or bacteria. However, unlike bacteria and insects, the nanties have the trainability of high level mammals like dogs or dolphins depending on the size of the colony. Its kind of like the saying “If you give a thousand monkeys a thousand typewriters they’ll eventually produce King Lear.” Well, it is the same way with the nanites except they would only need a thousand micro-seconds (if you taught them how to type first)
Now your next two questions will not be as easy to answer as the first, because their answers invovle a lot of fictional history and modern science blended together. um okay i have to go but i will finish this post soon. .
“It was originally part of an experimental project run by DARPA (the Defense Advanced Research Programs Agency), and was the culmination of several previous DARPA programs involving nano-manufacturing, robotics, and artificial intelligence.” Yes! The chief weapons designer in the Superhero Nation comic book is named Dr. Darpa. I’m glad that someone will get the reference.
Ghost your story sounds good…Im excited to see what kind of characters you have.
So i have this story idea, im hoping it will be a novel, but i have never actually finished a project before, all i want is comments on how good the idea sounds, so be as brutal as you want. (pardon my spelling/grammar it sucks)
the story is about a high school junior (year 11) named jake, who is somewhat of a loner, with only two real friends, and spends most of his free time on his computer. In the begining he is overwieght, has his hair cut short (im thinking 1/4 inch buzz cut) and is obsessed with becoming “cooler”. Jake feels he has lived his whole life away from the spotlight and it disqusts him. he is also hopelessly infatuated with one of the hottest girls in school, named Jennifer, who has no idea he exists.
one night, as part of a cruel prank, a bunch of the more popular students invite jake and his friends to go on a camping trip with them. (they plan a prank once they get there, but i’m not sure what this is yey). However, there is a freak meteor shower and several large objects crash nearby.
the objects are identifed as five pods that were carring something inside of them, which is later revealed to be several humanoids in power armor. after a short stint of these mysterious humanoids terrorizing the town, it is revealed that they are aliens searching for a specific family that has ties to their planet.
it is then revealed to jake that his family is what they are searching for, as they are the descendants of an alien that was exhiled here for yet unknown reasons. the aliens find this out, and jakes father is killed. Jake, being the only male left in the blood line who is able to fight, is given the families secret possession, the power armor of their alien ancestor, which, when not in use, colapses down into either something he wears on his wrist (a very manly braclet) or something like a belt that he can wear somewhat inconspicuously.
jake then manges to defeat the aliens that are hunting him, through the use of his new armor and what little knowledge of martial arts he has. when he fights the alien leading this group, it is revealed that they are only scouts, and that a bigger threat is on the way (sorry if this sounds DBZish, I will do my best to make it original).
fearing that he cannot take on powerful alien warriors, jake freaks out and hides in his house. a few weeks later, he encounters Jayden, who is also an alien that landed in the meteor shower, but unlike the others he has come to prevent an interstellar war between his people and the aliens that attacked the town. He agrees to teach jake how to fight in order to face the threat that is coming, which is five more alien soldiers, but of an elite caste that is highly skilled and breed for combat. (my main villans)
jayden also tells jake that they are not coming for him, but for another that is tied to their bloodline, but he does not say who because he feels that they will have a harder time finding this person if jake doesnt know. his training takes two months, though he still attends school, and it changes him immensly. he goes from being over wieght to being well built, muscular and very agile, and the training boosts his confidence, catapulting him into popularity, and suddenly, everything he’s ever wanted is within his reach, including the girl of his dreams. then the aliens arrive and everything goes to hell.
Weaknesses (yes, there are some):
while his suit makes him superior in any confrontation with a human, it only evens a match between any of the aliens he encounters
his only true skill is that he has quickly mastered an alien form of combat
his suit is old, at least 200 years, though they are incredibly rugged, his isnt as durable as his enimies’ suits, and his begins to break after several fights
thats all i have right now. it is very chaotic and scattered, so anything will help
Hi def, I really like the weaknesses and the fact that Jake does have to train and this training affects his life in various ways.
But I am a little concerned that hostile aliens just happen to crash by his campsite, and then he discovers that he just happens to be half-alien himself. This might be tough to pull off. Also, just two months worth of training turns him into a hottie?
Is there any way that being half-alien would make him predisposed to be overweight/awkward/nerdy? At least then that could explain the quick turnaround once he got in touch with his origins and started proper training, the way taking supplements can almost instantly help your health if you’re deficient in something.
Also, from Jake’s point of view, what’s so great about the spotlight? He’d have done something to attract attention by now if that’s what he really honestly wanted. I think with the lack of self-confidence, he’s built up a dream of how great his life would be if he was a totally different person, not realizing that wherever he goes, there he is. He’s not playing to his own strengths, and he’s never going to get real self-confidence unless he figures out the strengths he already has and enhances and uses them.
He might be able to fake new, cooler traits for awhile, but they aren’t who he is and they won’t do much for him in the long run.
One thing that I think will make him a much more authentic character is if he stays the same person – a stronger, more confident version of himself is great. But not somebody who goes from being an introvert to an extravert (because a true introvert is exhausted by being around people, and extraverts are energized by other people, and that just doesn’t change in real life) or from being a couch potato to loving exercise and training (because that’s an incredibly difficult change in real life too).
Anyway, it sounds like you have a rough idea of your character and his origins, which leaves you lots of room to play around with it and refine it until it rings true to you. It’s okay to take a long time to lay the groundwork like this – if you don’t get the groundwork right, you’ll end up with another half-finished story that can’t stand (speaking from experience here).
One last thing: please don’t ask people to be brutal. Most don’t need an excuse, though from what I’ve read here everyone is very well-behaved and I’m sure B. Mac will smack anybody who starts flaming.
Honesty, clarity, and politeness make good critiques that you can use. Brutality, snark, and other putdowns make a writer upset and obsessive, and sometimes defensive, and that doesn’t help creativity. You and your writing deserve common courtesy, so ask for it and own it 
A lot of what I typed up when I posted was created on the spot, I was really excited to find such a helpful website, so much of it had not yet been seriously run over. As to the whole campsite coincidence, I will be heavily editing it; however, I do plan to have them land near his home town, as they do know that Jake’s father, and their primary target, live in the area, though they lack knowledge of their exact Identities. I also think a scout force should have a stealthier entrance, and may move the campsite meteor shower to when the second wave arrives. As to the training, I have realized that it takes time for average weight people to look hot, so your hybrid predisposition Idea holds merit, and I will definitely try to Incorporate It into the plot.
As for the spotlight, Jake Is exactly as you explained, he’s never fit in, so he built up this great fantasy about what it would be like to be cool. However, he fails to see his true strength, and like you said It Is a false sense of self confidence, but he tries to play it to his advantage. I also want him to realize that all that he’s glorified isn’t something that he truly wants, that he isn’t meant to be like the “In crowd”, and build on his real strength. (I still haven’t figured all this out, I do my best thinking while I’m writing, even If I’m not thinking about what I write.)
As for the whole introvert extrovert concept, I want him to fall in the middle, not totally a loner, but not someone who can handle people all the time either. I know this may confuse you based on what I wrote, but as I read your comment I realized that a story about a total loner will be somewhat boring, at least to me, and If It bores me I’ll never write It, so that needs some more work.
As far as the overweight aspect, and his exercise routine, he never grows to love it, but views it as necessary to maintain his combat efficiency. I also don’t want him to look like a total nerd, the kind with coke bottle lenses, braces and bad acne, isn’t the Image I want to portray. I think we can all agree that computers (a major Identifying factor of a nerd), are major part of life, so his choice to use his allot is supposed to add to his kind of lonely atmosphere (f It still screams nerd, I may have to cut It.) I want to portray him as someone who Isn’t living up to his full potential because he Is so blinded by delusions of grandeur that he cannot see It, and then he slowly begins to realize It when he Is drawn Into a situation that he can change, If he chooses to act.
If you have any Ideas on how to help me accomplish this, then please share.
Oh, and as to the brutality comment, it was meant as sarcasm, though it probably didn’t come across that way. I find flames sent my way to be quite humorous, as they generally are groundless, and sometimes someone’s attempt at discouragement can motivate me to finish more than a helpful comment, I believe both are necessary, sometimes negative comments can evoke new thoughts, and change the way you view something differently, other times I can just Ignore It, however you are right, just because I tell hateful critics to shove It doesn’t mean I should encourage them to be rude to the rest of the people that want help. I will remove the aforementioned comment from future posts.
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[EDITOR: Gosh, that was a lot of editing and I don't even know if I got it all. Work on that writing, pal
Well, I did hesitate a bit about including “nerdy” in the list of ways your character could come across
And I’ll be teaching how to do proper critiques soon in my class – bad critiques _kill_ writers, so it’s a tender spot for me. I tend to point out false ideas about critiques whenever I see them – anything to kill the myth that crits should be mean.
I’ve studied a bit about introversion and extraversion – for instance, my husband and I are both introverts, and our 4yo is an extravert. We have to handle him in shifts, because, cute as he is, he’s exhausting. He gets a charge out of interacting with us (and anybody else) and we wear down. This is an interesting dynamic that creates real-life problems and can be applied to just about everything.
There are degrees to intro- and extra- version, so your character doesn’t have to be a total loner, but if he’s even slightly introverted, trying to maintain fame like an extravert is going to make this charade really exhausting and he’ll crash when he finally comes home. Which will make it tough to get up in the morning and train, and probably turn him into a total jerk for as long as he gets little sleep and no real satisfaction from the realization of his dream.
I think you have a great framework to explore this kind of dynamic in a way that rings true – I think most introverts have tried to “fix” themselves by becoming the more socially acceptable extravert, so Jake’s very easy to identify with. The trick, I think, is going to be getting this across in a way that doesn’t come across as hokey.
thanks alot, your posts have really helped me shape my character, i’ll post back when i get some more of the plot nailed down.
You’re very welcome
I’m of the “plot arises from character” school of thought myself, so the more you know about Jake, the better the plot will be in the end.
Alright guys first off let me say that I really enjoy this site, because it offers so much advice. Secondly, I need help with my own Super Hero Novel that I am writing. This will be more of an emotional book than action, so it’ll be set more for drama.
Here is an origin I am trying to use for the super-human community:
The meteor that destroyed the dinosaur population gave off some strange gas that tainted several primitive humans and eventually formed a second race, identified and named in the 1960s as Homo Super by Dr. Abson. Homo Super or Superhumans as they are now called have all become carriers of the A-Gene. The A-Gene is the gene that is what carries the persons’ super-powers, which have since then varied extremely widely. There is literally know defining super-power which means super-humans vary differently with there powers and level of strength. This means that they are not equal and some are far stronger than others.
So what do you guys think? Also could you set up a review forum for me?
Hello, Jake. I’ve set up a review forum for you here.
I think your premise is okay, but I think the story could be fleshed out. For example, who are the main characters? What’s at stake for them? What are their personalities like? What are they trying to accomplish?
Also, why did it take until the 1960s to discover that superhumans have existed for thousands of years?
Oh, and I added your website to your first comment.
Thanks. And I actually have several things fleshed out. I just didn’t want to overload anyone lol. So I will have a comment on the review forum up later explaining nearly everything.
Thanks again.
Okay, that sounds good.
for Jake, i was thinking of linking his metabolism to his activity level. so in the begining of the book, when he doesnt do much, his metabolism slows down, and he becomes over weight. Then, when he begins training, his metabolism increases so that he burns calories faster and loses weight faster.
Hi def
That’s an interesting idea with lots of implications – for one, he’s going to be starving all the time once he starts training. The increase in muscle mass will mean he’s burning more calories even at rest, and he’s going to have a hard time keeping weight on once he’s burned through his fat. I foresee a lot of protein shakes in his future, and that stuff they market for marathon runners and weightlifters: Gu, creatine, whey protein, energy bars, etc. Gu is disgusting, by the way, no matter what flavor you get 
It sounds almost like a hibernation-type of metabolism once you exaggerate it to that point – store up fat and limit activity, and switch to becoming more active and more fit. It’s not such a stretch to me to expect his metabolism to be a little screwed up since he’s half-alien. He might actually need to cycle between extreme fitness and near-hibernation in order to keep his health in balance, or it could be a feature of the alien race. Maybe they need to cycle through in a more extreme way and actually hibernate, and he has an advantage in that he doesn’t have to, even though he’ll never reach the extreme level of strength that they can.
Anyway, it’s a thought
you’ve just given me and idea for a possible sequal.
if i were to consider it, i could end the book on a cliff hanger with jake’s suit broken and at least one of his enemies still alive. however, that enemy has to go into his hibrenation period, (sounds lucky breakish but if it is set up right it could work), and then Jayden decides to take jake to the alien planet to acquire another suit. On the other planet, i could have some kind of trial to prove his worth, (since hes half human he could be viewed as weak) and i could limit the time of the hibernation so that jake has to worry about making it back to Earth before his enemy wakes up, providing suspense, and then have a big battle to wrap it all up.
Yeah, I don’t think it’d be a lucky break. That late in the book, you could write it so that the hibernation period is a result of something Jake does.
Hi def – I’m happy to help (and glad you don’t think I’m crazy
)
I was looking at this website and I was thinking of something along the lines of spiritual rather than scientific for my character’s origin story. It lends a lot more from anime/manga than it does from comic book realms but I figure that you guys will still have more expertise on this sort of thing than I do, especially since I will be planning on it being in an American Comic Book setting.
I was figuring that my main character could be someone that was from a clan of martial artists that attacked with spiritual energy that were wiped out recently. The way this energy is utilized in battle is derived into the 2 categories of “Internal Use” and “External Use.” Internal Use is when energy is used in order to amplify physical attributes (strength, speed, sight, hearing, etc) in order to attack or evade enemies. External Use is when energy is used in order to fire energy blasts or create spiritual objects (whips, swords, shields, etc). This would create a great upside of versatility that will allow the character a variety of options to use in battle. The downside of this power is that it if he uses too much at one time that then he will become extremely fatigued or if he really overexerts himself, death. The way the character would try to minimize this downsize is trying to train himself as much as possible in order to increase the amount of energy he can use at one time.
Hmm. That sounds good, A. Jones. It’ll probably feel less realistic than a sci-fi origin, but realism is a style and not a requirement.
That said, I think that US comics publishers are a bit skewed towards sci-fi rather than fantasy (except Dark Horse, probably).
Is this a modern setting? Using a modern setting might be one way to make a fantasy comic more palatable to a US publisher. I think that manga publishers are more open to stories set in the distant past, particularly feudal times. In contrast, most US comics (even the fantasies) are set in the present or thereabouts. (IE: Hellboy, Buffy, Dr. Strange, I Kill Giants, Dresden Files, that comic, and anything else adapted from an urban fantasy series).
He is going to be in a modern setting on a team of young superheroes (in my universe it is a requirement for superheroes to spend at least 4 years, once they turn 18 and either graduated from a superhero academy or received a waiver from someone from Head Committee in the Heroes Union [they are like the Justice League] on a team mentored by an established superhero before they can become a licensed superhero).
What I want to do with this story is to thrust a dark anime/manga anti-hero type character into a team of typical comic book heroes against his will. I think it would be an interesting culture clash for the reader to enjoy. For example in anime stories villains are usually killed by the protagonists without any sort of hesitation while the typical hero in a comic book would want to keep him alive at all costs.
If you were doing it on a group of superheroes would it be necessary to give all of them an origin, or could you leave some of it for the readers to decide?
[EDITOR: Please Don't Capitalize All Your Words! It's Really Annoying]
Hello Blah (x3),
What’s the size of your team? The larger the team the less amount of time I’d recommend spending on origin stories. If the team has no more than five character, I’d say it would be okay to devote a sentence of origin for your members.
Ke$ha, I think you might be able to get away without giving one or more of them an origin, particularly if the origin is similar or significantly more banal than the origins that the reader learns about. For example, if one of the characters is a wizard who sold his soul to the Dark Lord of Retribution for ultimate power and another guy is just a melee punk, it would be far easier for us to infer what’s going on with the punk than the wizard. However, if the melee punk is actually a master of six kinds of martial arts, only two of which are taught on this planet, then spelling it out would probably be helpful.
Also, if you’re interested in doing individual origins for all of the characters, one possibility that might help you save time is just having a character recount what happened in a sentence or two and then you can spend more time on one or two of the origins that are particularly important to the story.
Thanks RaggedBoy And B.Mac
Both were very helpful and I’m starting to come up with their origins and just going to recount them like you said 
Thanks!
How do you brign the whole mutant story in without feeling like an X-Men rip-off? Just change the mutant origin? The name?
Well, generally, the primary steps taken are indeed a different name (or no name) and a different origin, DC Comics handled this by using the same basic story as Marvel provided for the Inhumans, an alien race came to Earth and genetically altered numerous human beings, leading to an unrecognized separate-but-superior subspecies. However, I don’t think that a story using a basic “Wee! Superpowers randomly appeared!” origin is necessarily going to draw comparisons to X-Men unless you bring them. The television series Heroes invited them by actually using the whole evolution jargon taken directly from X-Men in the pilot and beyond, but there’s been plenty of stories before and after X-Men that involved random appearances of powers, and it really only becomes apparent they are inspired by X-Men when they directly take from the X-Men.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/It‘s_a_Good_Life_(The_Twilight_Zone)
If you just take an idea but put a twist on it, it should be fine. I would recommend looking at lots of shows/comics and things like that. Checking their idea’s and then seeing the difference and you could take something from each one, creating your own.
My background is in Biology, so I was inspired by some of my education:
My solution for the origin of powers (“Talents”) was that the arrival of two alien races altered reality (because of their ships’ Synapse drives- point to point quantum travel) so that anyone conceived around 1989 has the chance of having their junk DNA removed and placed into a third sex chromosome (Z, or “Zeta”). This is a deus in machina device that lets someone react to high stress environments and adapt instantly a mechanism to respond. For example, being struck by lightning allow Marc Embers to control electricity and thunderstorms as Tempest. Nick Jennings was in a fiery car accident in a snowstorm, so can control fire and ice.
The other option I have for Talents is magic. There are no magicians like John Constantine or Harry Potter, but someone can be a descendant of a deity- Mane, who can channel animal powers through his great X grandfather Cernunnos. Or someone can wield a mystic or cosmic object. Bluehook gets his elephant strength from a family heirloom, an ancient ankhus. Foxfire gets his powers of fire control from a gem from outer space, just one of hundreds floating around since the beginning of time.
As long as your universe’s rules are consistent, there really shouldn’t be an other limits on what is plausible or not.
Hey guys since we’re talking about origin stories. I thought of an interesting idea today and would love to know what everyone might think. Ok so this idea would lend itself to a solo-hero story at first, like Spiderman. Ok so the main character would already be empowered and would be using his ability for fun and to show off. His life is great, right where he wants it. Fantastic family and a lab for performing his experiments with his friends and colleagues. Than his identity is stolen. His bank accounts and his experiments are nowhere to be found. The worst pert is that his colleagues, friends and even his family have no idea who he is. I’m talking the ulitmate identity theift. This spurs him to uncover who did this to him and why. This will lead him into conflict with, as I imagine it, a cut-throat businessperson (could be a man or a woman) who has become something of a superpower broker. This person would be the man main villain for his story for at least a couple arcs. I just wanted to get some opinions. Gauge the idea a little, so what does everyone think?
As far as identity theft, I found the premise of Existence 2.0 more interesting: the main character develops a body-swap process and uses it on a hitman that had been sent to kill him.
So the character loses his bank accounts, probably most of his possessions, his friends and family, etc. Why should readers care? Your premise sounds okay, but I don’t feel it’s as urgent as being thrown into the sink-or-swim world of a professional hitman.
Moreover, deeper in the rewriting process, one thing I’d worry about is that it sounds like the book starts more or less as he gets superpowers, but that the story starts noticeably after that (when his identity is stolen). How quickly could you wrap up the setup/premise and get to the part where he actually starts to resolve the conflict between him and the broker? If this were a comic book, I think it would be best if you could move from setup to the main conflict (or at least foreshadow the main conflict) inside of ten pages.
This might work better as a novel, I think. For one thing, novel readers will give you more time before getting bored and deciding that the story has failed to launch.
Well that idea was an ‘off the top of my head’ idea that just popped up yesterday. I’d like to pursue it. But maybe I’d forget about the identity thieft concept completely. And maybe the idea would work better like this; two friends, who have superpowers use them in secret to provide good lives for their families and themselves by stealing small-scale stuff and ripping people off. You know they con people, but they aren’t out to hurt anyone. Perhaps one of the people they steal from is the superpower broker, earning his/her attention. The main character and his friend are approached by this person and their lackeys. The broker tells the main character that in order to make amends, he must now round up people with superpowers to bring to him/her, no questions asked. The main character’s friend and partner in crime is taken as collateral. At least until the debt has been repaid. So forgetting about the identity thieft thing, what do you think about this idea?
Hm, it’s interesting Con-el. Sounds like Robin hood with superheros and the broker is king richard. Would this be a stand alone like your other concept or a series?
Not sure yet. I’m just trying to get some ideas. I’ve got my main project that I’m still trying to finalize and I merely wondered where I’m going next. I am attempting to build my own comic book universe not just one story. You know like how Marvel has X-men, Spiderman, Fantastic Four and the Avengers. I hope to construct a similar list of titale under my own banner. But for now I’m working on my one and only story for the time being. I’d like to get into details, but I’m afraid there really aren’t that many yet. I mean I’vew got the heroes, a few villains and the a tentative plot for arc 1, but that’s about it.
Yeah I get what you’re saying, what powers do your villains have? Is it one villain and a bunch of henchmen or are there individual villains?
They are individual villains. I mean some work together and some have similar goals, you know things like that. But my proudest accomplishment is the conception of The Empire. A group of some of the most powerful villains in my universe who have banned together to just do whatever they want. For now, it’s a small group but I intend to bolster their ranks during the course of the story.
As for the powers, well here’s the list.
-shadow manipulation
-super-strength
-multiplication
-telepathy
So brett, is that what you wanted to know?
Hey guys I’m in little need of assistance here. Simply I want people to gain abilities through eating food, plant and animals. I’m thinking along the lines of genetic modified and or dangerous chemicals. Not to sure yet, but any guidance with the pseudo- superhero science would be great.
Maybe the food comes primarily from a farm downstream of a large chemical plant that just had a major accident. The authorities only shut the place down after the food has been on the market for several hours, giving the protagonists (and maybe the antagonists) a chance to ingest the contaminated food before it’s recalled.
See Static Shock, TMNT, etc.
In terms of pseudo-science, I don’t think you’ll need to drop too much mumbo-jumbo on this one. It’s commonly accepted among superhero readers that chemicals unfit for human consumption can cause superpowers (and few major health problems) when consumed by or exposed to protagonists.
If you were so inclined, you could go into more detail into what the chemical plant is working on. Maybe something military-related. Maybe something nefarious. Either one would make it easier to understand why the chemicals just happen to cause superpowers, particularly exotic ones. (Generally, I think exotic superpowers deserve more explanation. Whereas superstrength, agility and intelligence are simply enhancements to what the body already does, borderline-magical abilities like weather-control and gravity-control usually benefit from a line or two of explanation to help readers suspend their disbelief).
Thanks B.Mac but I’m thinking more along the lines of pharmaceutical fruits and vegetables. The idea is that a new wonder vaccine is discovered by the heroes father and the public dub it the ‘holy grail’. His company is on a humanitarian mission and works with the World health organization and the Red cross to administrate it. Naturally it all goes wrong and it has to be rolled back before it causes a global crisis. Few millions might die, the few infected survivors gain powers. Not sure on everything yet though. But I do know the dad will end up killing himself out of immense guilt and the son will inherit his fathers burden.
Hmm, okay. Maybe the father genetically engineers a fruit to produce antibodies that can help fight a particular disease or a set of diseases. So, for example, just looking at HIV/AIDS… treating HIV in the US costs around $25,000 per patient per year. In the third world, it’s about $90 per year, which is a substantial burden in desperately poor countries where the average income might only be a few hundred dollars to begin with.
So the father figures “hey, if I can engineer these fruits to grow the treatment for [your favorite pressing disease], it’d be helluva cheap for third-world farmers to grow their own treatments.” Maybe the WHO is so excited about the prospects that they hastily sign off on the fruits without doing adequate long-term testing and they belatedly discovered that eating the fruits can cause substantial troubles a few years down the line. Unfortunately, by that point, it’s too late for most of the people that have started eating them. A small portion of the people survive with superpowers.
I assume that you’d want these fruits to be eaten in both the first world and third world, so maybe instead of AIDS or malaria specifically you’d do something like influenza or just a generic resistance to disease. As for sci-fi mumbo jumbo, you can make bold claims based on biology terms found on Wikipedia. IE: “The fruit has been genetically modified to produce a protein that drastically stimulates lymphocytic activity in the bone marrow, accelerating the immune response against [target].” Eventually, you can reveal that these super-lymphocytes gradually lose the ability to distinguish between native and foreign cells, causing a severe autoimmune response that is typically fatal. I wouldn’t recommend going into more detail than that unless you have a good reason to (for example, if you’re doing a medical thriller like The Andromeda Strain).