Nov 23 2007
Quote of the Day: Friday– Don’t drink the gatorade!
A note posted on the Office of Special Investigations’ office refrigerator.
At some point in the past six hours, a Gatorade bottle disappeared from this refrigerator. It had blue contents and a label reading “Agent Orange’s: do not take under penalty of death. I MEAN IT.”
I must consult with the unauthorized drinker immediately to discuss his/her/its future with the agency and any appropriate HR paperwork (benefits, next-of-kin notification/estate planning and last rites arrangements).
Possible symptoms include:
- Hemoglobular disassociation (“blood feud”)
- Sore throat and coughing
- Writhing
- Loss of appetite
- Headache, disorientation and/or brain strangulation
- Spontaneous combustion
Thanks!
–OJ