Archive for August 23rd, 2007

Aug 23 2007

Comic Book Conundrums

I provide advice about how to write novels, comic books and graphic novels. Most of my content applies to fiction-writing in general, but I also provide articles specifically about superhero stories.

Inquiring minds want to know:

  • Supervillain prisons. Why have them?
  • How does Superman keep getting movie deals?
  • Why don’t Superman’s movie deals stipulate the presence of a supervillain?
  • Lex Luthor: brilliant mastermind or government plant? His most brilliant schemes endanger fewer people than a fully loaded Yugo. And he gets pardoned FAR too often for it to be a coincidence.
  • Who is Captain America working for? He couldn’t cover the security deposit on that cavernous NYC apartment with an Army paycheck.
  • WWII time-travel. Aren’t any WWII time-travelers gunning for Hitler? Would assassinating Hitler doom the Allies by letting someone sane lead German forces? (Hitler: Allied plant?)
  • Time travel. “Dr. Demented escaped into the time-space continuum. He could be anywhere.” “No problem. I’ll start at 1939, you start at 1945 and we’ll catch him somewhere in the middle.”
  • Supervillains have attempted to influence WWII at least twenty different times in the past fifty years. Presumably, supervillains will keep trying. Wouldn’t superheroes from our present cross paths with superheroes from our future that are pursuing their own supervillains in WWII?
  • The Hulk: why does he still get published?
  • Invisible Woman: dumbest Ph. D. ever?
  • Beast. Reptile. Catastrophe. Donatello. Aren’t there any animals/monstrosities that are less intelligent than the Invisible Woman? Why do said animals typically wear more clothes than the Invisible Woman?

Comic Books: Hot and NotHer main asset isn't being invisible.

  • Lois Lane: “How many F’s are there in catastrophe?” How did she win a Pulitzer?
  • Static Shock’s sidekick, the white gadgeteer (AKA Gear, AKA Whitey, AKA Chunky McGee). What, a black person can’t be smart enough to make gadgets?
  • What is the fascination with supervillains (and sometimes heroes) running for president?
  • Did Savage Dragon run for VP because he realized how useless he was?
  • How could Lex Luthor POSSIBLY win the presidency? Voters regularly write candidates off because they’re Mormon, divorced or inexperienced. But, you know…a supervillain… I guess I could give him another chance…
  • What was the reasoning behind making an Ant-Man movie?
  • Dr. Hank Pym, Ant-Man, Shrinking Violet. Why haven’t they learned that intelligent people don’t shrink themselves? That’s why supervillains build shrink rays.
  • What the hell is going on in NYC? Judging from comic books, at least 90% of the world’s supernatural events happen there, including regular influxes of tan New Yorkers from alternate dimensions where NYC is apparently devoid of black people (the Friends Effect).

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