If you can spare a few dollars/pounds/euros, I would really appreciate it.

SN guest writer Jeremy Melloul is trying to raise funds for his upcoming comic book on KickStarter.  Screws Loose is a supernatural military thriller about a team of mercenaries that finds a mysterious crate.  Even a $10 donation gets you a copy of the comic (when it comes out) and a $25 donation gets you a copy and character designs.  I have donated $150 in the off-hand chance that the mysterious crate holds a bathtub full of rabid mongeese.  “That’ll teach you to be a mercenary in a supernatural thriller!”

(I wonder if there’s any chance his thank you card will have a sketch of his characters fighting off a bathtub of rabid mongeese.  That would be the most badass thank you card I’ve ever seen).

1. Because you need the money.  It usually takes around 10 years to get published and the typical advance for a first novel is usually around $5000 (assuming it gets published), which is scandalously low for a project that will probably take thousands of hours and might not ever get published.  If you need money, get a day job.  If your main consideration is financial, other types of writing that typically pay better (and more reliably) include copywriting/advertising, corporate communications, journalism, nonfiction books and unemployment forms. Writing comic books also pays better than writing novels, but you’d still be dealing with some of the same risks/uncertainties and reliability issues.  Outside of writing, virtually every full-time job pays more reliably and more by the hour.  It is depressingly rare for a novelist to beat minimum wage, so you’d probably make more working at McDonald’s.

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I’ve passed my teaching interview and will be teaching high school assuming I pass my background check. But they’ll only start paying me three weeks after starting, so I need savings to cover those first three weeks.  I’d really appreciate if you would donate to help defray my costs, especially if you’ve benefited from my reviews and/or articles and/or would like to be a Benefactor of Badassery.

• Basic proofreading. I’ll fix your grammar, spelling and punctuation.  The rate for this ranges from one cent per word for a polished writer to five cents for someone who needs more proofreading help.  If you have fewer than three typos per page, I’d offer you a rate of one cent per word.
• Query letters and submission letters. When you submit a novel manuscript or comic book script to a publisher, you also need to include a letter explaining your proposal in a persuasive fashion.  Usually this is one page long for a novel and one to two pages long for comic book proposals.  $100 for the first page and $50 for every subsequent page.
• Header design. I’d have to work out a rate based on what you’d like in your header, but this would probably be around $100-125 for Photoshopped photography and text and $200-300 if you’d like something more cartoony, like our header.
• Stylistic rewrite. I’ll rewrite a chapter (or chapters) to be more effective.  This is considerably more expensive than simple proofreading.  I’ll quote you a rate after seeing the chapter(s), but probably around 10-15 cents per word.
• Comic book formatting and proofreading. This ranges from $10 per page for a well-polished script to $20 per page for a script that needs a lot of editing.  If there are fewer than 3 typos per page, I will offer a rate of $10 per page.

A few notes to keep in mind.

• If the order is more than $100, I’d like half of the total payment upfront and half upon completion to your satisfaction.  If it’s less than $100, I’d like all of it upfront.
• Most of my past clients have paid with Paypal.  If you have something else in mind, please let me know and we can work that out.
• I am (ludicrously) American, but I’ve worked with British spelling before.  If you’re trying to get published in Britain, Australia or Canada, I’d be honoured to work with you.

If you’d be interested in working with me, please let me know at superheronation-at-gmail-dot-com .  Thanks!

I’m applying for a job a day for two weeks.  So far, I’ve gotten an offer I’m considering.  And a bait-and-switch scam.  I forgot the cardinal rule of writing: any writing job that pays more than $10 an hour is a lie.  (I’m exaggerating, but not much).

Legal disclaimer time! The FTC is requiring US bloggers, as of December 1, to disclose the receipt of free products. 

1.  Please assume that every novel and comic book I review has been given to me as a promotional copy. 

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We don’t sell ads or subscriptions here.  I’d really appreciate if you could donate to help offset our art and hosting costs.  Thanks.