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“A neoconservative is a liberal that’s been mugged by reality.”

–Irving Kristol

Forget reality, what we care about at Superhero Nation is mugging.  Within a week, you will be able to mug yourself by spending a mere $9 on authentic Superhero Nation mugs.  Some designs we’re contemplating are…

1. My own picture (I’m the guy in the middle of the header; no surprises there), with the tagline:  “Being bad has never looked this good.”
2. Perhaps a PG-13 one featuring some raunchy coffee-related puns.  (”I always take it black and sweet.  Wait, you mean my coffee?”)  We’ll see.
3. The Superhero Nation logo, with this tagline: “A neoconservative is a liberal that’s been mugged by reality; a Superhero National is a comic book fan that’s been mugged by political science.”
4. “The human brain only operates at 10% capacity.  Hence, coffee.”  — Catastrophe
5. “Death before dishonor, but nothing before caffeine.”

Clearly we need to have another editorial board meeting on this subject.  [For the love of Buddha, get the rights to a Paingod illustration.  If we can't sell a mug with a quote from Paingod, we should just pack it up right now.-- Cadet Davis]

The Superhero Movie trailer looks pretty poor.

1. It seems to be focused entirely on Spiderman jokes, but its Spidey jokes are not too good. OK, it’s hard for superheroes to get suited up… I hope they’re playing with more fire than that. (I predict two jokes about Green Goblin’s power-ranger mask… one of those might have been funny, except that it was so predictable).

2. Leslie Nielsen. He was hilarious in Wrongfully Accused and fine in A Space Travesty, but his presence does not inspire confidence.

3. Nielsen’s movies frequently confuse random bursts of activity with comedy. Sometimes that works, like when Irish terrorists burst into step-dance in Wrongfully Accused. Usually it doesn’t, like when the Spiderman knockoff starts break-dancing on a wall.

4. Time plays against Superhero Movie. Parodies in most genres need a conventional plot to meet their time limit. (How many underwear jokes can you do before people walk out?) The problem is that the trailer doesn’t inspire much confidence on that front. Wrongfully Accused and Airplane, for example, did a pretty good job putting together real plots to harness their comedy.

I expect that this movie will be a stream of disconnected and largely disappointing jokes.

If you want a funny superhero movie, I recommend renting Mystery Men instead. Alternatively, I’d recommend seasons 1 and 2 of Lois and Clark, which was a TV show that was closer to a romantic comedy than a traditional superhero action story. It was very well-executed and the acting was distinctly good. I don’t read many comic books, comical or otherwise, but I’d recommend The Hood for its comedic content. Its FBI side-characters were so hilarious that they actually inspired me to start writing Superhero Nation.

“Is the University of Florida a better university because the school’s basketball team won back-to-back NCAA championships?”  — George Leef

“Not merely a better university, the best university.”– Agent Orange, everybody’s second-favorite Florida Gator.  (After Albert, obviously).