Hmm. This has a few formatting issues, but nonetheless I found it dangerously amusing.
I’m going to remove phrases like “(he/she) must convince (himself/herself),” because they look horribly awkward. I’ll see if randomly generating a gender is possible, but if not I’ll change it to masculine pronouns across the board. (Feel free to mentally substitute in “she” and “herself,” of course).
I think we can come up with a way that all the (a)s get turned turned into ‘a’s, and that they only come up when grammatically appropriate.
I suspect the ‘a’ vs. ‘an’ errors will remain. Maybe PM can come up with a magical solution that changes the ‘a’ in “a [adjective] accountant” to an ‘an’ whenever the given adjective starts with a vowel, but personally I don’t think mixing up ‘a’ and ‘an’ is a major problem.
The program is just as likely to pick Richard Nixon as any other protagonist. There’s a lot of repetition, though, because there aren’t all that many choices for each category.
The good news is that P. Mac will update the code to expand each of the categories later this week:
–Incitements: from 19 -> 32
–Antagonists: from 19 -> 35
–Protagonists: from 40 -> 55
–Goals: from 20 -> 44
–Adjectives: from ~40 -> ~80
I won’t belabor the numbers unless you’re interested, but if you generate 5 plots, you only have a 14% chance of getting a unique incitement, antagonist, protagonist, and goal each time.
After getting brained by (a) improbably anti-American businessman, (a) improbably anti-American publisher’s assistant must leave a trail of bodies that makes the beaches of Normandy look like Candyland.
“(a) improbably badass dinosaur must discover that the love interest is the only other racial minority in the book” –> It works if you use “race” like fantasy authors do, as a synonym for “species.” So we’re apparently talking about a businessman throwing a lovelorn dinosaur into a woodchipper… in Middle-Earth!
After getting hired by (a) long-forgotten businessman, (a) long-forgotten student that needs better adult supervision must convince Mossad that he’s not a terrorist, just a Dell customer.
After getting thrown into a wood-chipper by a Playboy centerfold working for a Playboy centerfold working for (a) improbably badass sorcerer, (a) repulsive scientist that should have known better must woo the love interest without getting busted for stalking or sexual harassment.
After getting cheated on by a lone gunman, (a) implausibly heterosexual hitman must disprove the Heisenberg Principle, preferably before he explodes next Thursday.
“‘After getting fired by a Playboy centerfold working for a traitorous & shifty accountant that hates alligators, a wannabe athlete must kill everybody involved.” A shifty accountant that hates alligators?! DOES HE HATE FREEDOM?” Haha! 1) Probably. 2) Do the alligators think that the supermodel is a Mossad assassin? Double points in this case: the alligators are wearing shirts from various Florida sports teams, so perhaps they count as wannabe athletes, and killing everybody involved is basically a given for a detective story.
“I also heard that someone in the Israeli side of my family was in the Mossad… but we don’t talk about that guy.” Given his employer, I’m guessing he would appreciate that. 🙂
“There’s a little alligator too now! There’s more of them!” The fan artist asked if there were any other characters Gain might joke with about Gary, and I told him that tentatively Gain might have a nephew or something. Apparently the nephew is an elite sand artist and (not surprisingly) can name a group who may plausibly want to kill Gary. (Not surprising because everybody wants to kill Gary).
That nephew definitely has some skills. I must admit, I am jealous. If I could do anything with sand art I would use it as an excuse to go to the beach every 20 minutes. But alas, here I am, drowning in chemistry. Unfortunate life choices indeed…
“Friendly reminder that they/them/their as singular gender neutral pronoun has been perfectly acceptable grammar for hundreds of years…” I feel that using a plural pronoun (e.g. “they” or “them”) for a single subject could be awkward, particularly in a sentence that uses a noun which actually is plural. For example, “The generals know that every Marine will carry their weight and more” makes it sound like the Marines are carrying the generals’ weight because the generals are the only plural noun in the sentence.
We’re up to 62 superhero movies since 2000. You can download the full data here. Some observations: R movies are making up the quality gap with PG-13 movies. Both DC and Marvel movies are getting better over time. DC superhero properties are averaging 47% since 2000, compared to 62% for Marvel and 69% […]
Hey DeadPool, You are a funny guy. How did you become a super hero? What do you do when you’re not doing anything? Do you like being a superhero? Why do you wear a mask? Why do you wear red and white? Are you Canadian? Getting superpowers is sort of a long story. Some people […]
I feel like a marketing executive put a gun to the screenwriter’s head and said “I don’t CARE what the movie is about, put New York City, London, and Hong Kong in it. Just do that thing where the villain is trying to collect plot coupons around the world in places that happen to be […]
Den Warren, (K-Tron, Metahuman Wars) is issuing a call for 3k-5k word submissions for a superhero prose fiction anthology titled, The Supreme Archvillain Election. Each submission will be a supervillain sitting at a huge table explaining why they should be voted as the Supreme Archvillain, then they go into a story, etc. Reprint excerpts and […]
1. This movie is about as bad as Catwoman but, in Catwoman’s defense, it had okay action scenes. 2. Man of Steel particularly struggled with family dialogue. E.g. Clark’s Kryptonian parents take 3 minutes to describe their plan to send him to Earth and say their goodbyes. It’s pretty bland stuff, e.g. melodramatic intonations like […]
I spent 5 hours this week watching Man of Steel and taking 5,000 words of notes. It was like being trapped on an alien planet where the atmosphere consists 80% of characters telling Clark what incredible, grandiose things he symbolizes, 20% of daringly bad action scenes, 15% of grimly constipated expressions, and 15% of acting […]
Out of the Past is a 1947 noir thriller so brilliant I cannot do it justice. I would definitely recommend it, particularly if you’re working with… Characters Plots Accidental deaths falsely claimed as murder-suicides Double-crosses, triple-crosses, and maybe a quadruple-cross depending on how you interpret a self-defense kill with a fishing reel. A complex plot […]