Mar 31 2009

A Villainous Forum

If you have any questions about villains or villainy, please ask them here.  Here are some sample questions to get you thinking.  (If you’d like to use these, go ahead).

  • Is my plot any good?  How could I improve it?
  • How can my villain challenge my hero?
  • How can I make my villain more stylish?
  • Should the villain’s origin story be related to the hero’s?
  • Is my villain too corny?

42 responses so far

42 Responses to “A Villainous Forum”

  1. Davidon 31 Mar 2009 at 4:35 pm

    I think I’ve got a decent villain, but I don’t want to reveal too much about him. I need a name for him.

  2. B. Macon 31 Mar 2009 at 4:39 pm

    A good name is usually tied to some distinguishing traits about the character. What are some traits of your villain?

  3. Davidon 31 Mar 2009 at 4:45 pm

    He’s smart, he has a lot of magical power and he has a connection to Cara.

  4. scribblaron 31 Mar 2009 at 5:42 pm

    How early should you introduce your villain… mine comes in very late in the storyline. Well, nearly two-thirds of the way through, and there is little hint of him before then.

    The good guys know there is a bad guy, and they go against several lesser bad guys, but they have no clue who the big one is until wham!

  5. Ragged Boyon 31 Mar 2009 at 5:43 pm

    I can’t really get a good idea of the character from just this. I don’t think a connection to Cara would factor into his name.

    What about Smart Mystic, The Knower of Cara as his name? :-P

    Ok, maybe not. I think B. Mac meant character traits. For example, My character Adrian is dramatic, flashy, and an actor. Therefore, Showtime is an adequate name for him.

    What is his personality? What makes him interesting? I know you don’t want to disclose much information, but we need enough to work with.

  6. Fitzon 31 Mar 2009 at 5:54 pm

    scribblar, I think it’s fine that you wait to introduce the villain that long. Just make sure that the book has some kind of goal so it doesn’t just seem like a random collection of stuff before the two-thirds point.

    David, I agree with Ragged Boy.

  7. Fitzon 31 Mar 2009 at 6:10 pm

    I’ve got two ideas for villainous comedies.

    What do you think of a comedy story focused on an extremely incompetent villain? He has dedicated his life is to becoming a superhero’s nemesis, but he uh… sucks at it. For example, he would be more focused on coming up with an evil-sounding name for himself and designing an evil-looking costume than actually doing something real villains would do. Nobody takes him seriously except for himself.

    Another idea I’ve got for a villainous comedy is focused on the stereotypical supervillain after he has taken over the world. What would he do? He’d probably get bored pretty quickly and start trying to create a superhero to challenge him, just so that he can see some action again.
    So, what do you think of these ideas?

  8. B. Macon 31 Mar 2009 at 6:32 pm

    I agree that the connection to Cara probably wouldn’t factor into his name. He’s a lot older than she is, right? So he’d probably have been named before she was born. ;-)

  9. Davidon 31 Mar 2009 at 7:26 pm

    I’m going to look through Irish names and pick one of those.

  10. Kynnastonon 31 Mar 2009 at 9:35 pm

    I’m having trouble with my villain, Delete.

    He is Sebastian’s polar opposite. But I’m having trouble forming adequate reasons why Delete would want to oppose B so much. After all, B’s plan seem pretty splendid to me. I can’t imagine anyone who wants to purposely destroy the Earth.

    Is it enough that Delete just has a grudge with Sebastian as a person and wants to destroy everything he touches?

  11. Matton 31 Mar 2009 at 11:06 pm

    Fitz, I like the second one. It sounds interesting and fairly unique. It brings to mind the original ‘Wanted’ but with a very different tone. Perhaps you could cover his original plans in the first few chapters/comics with him building a secret fortress and enslaving the human race but as he grows bored he begins meddling with giving people powers. He intentionally/accidentally loses a new hero into the world and realises his time ruling the world may be over.

    The first one doesn’t interest me as much. It doesn’t feel very new or original. Unless you put an interesting spin on it, then I’d recommend leaving it alone. For example: the villain is so bad, he’s accidentally good and draws the attention of a truly badass villain who mistakes him for a hero. Or the hero is just as incompetent and oblivious as the villain and between the two of them they cause so much that civilians come to hate them both. I’m sure you can come up with better ideas than those though.

  12. scribblaron 01 Apr 2009 at 1:58 am

    I like the first idea, Fitz. It put me in mind of the scene in Watchman where they were talking about the kind who wasn’t a villain but dressed up as one, begging heroes to hit him – until Rorschach threw him down an elevator shaft.

    It also puts me in mind of the beginning of PotC, where Jack Sparrow seems to be the worst pirate ever, until his plan comes together and the Navy looks on in awe.

  13. Bretton 01 Apr 2009 at 8:14 am

    Is it possible for the hero to have a showdown with the villain in a fantasy setting–let’s say an intrepid mercenary-hero and his traveling companion vs. sneaky megalomaniacal king– without it coming off as Luke vs. Emperor Palpatine? More than likely, this guy is not going to fight personally, but I don’t want him to be a SURPRISE! sorcerer. It’s a real conundrum.

    The idea I have at this point is that he’ll try to escape through a booby-trapped palace that may or may not be swarming with bodyguards. But it’s not really an escape because he’s leading the hero into the traps purposefully, hoping to kill him.

    The history between the evil king and the hero (which I think is kinda unique) is that the king pretended to be friendly and sent the hero on a quest to retrieve a holy-grail-esque object (oversimplification here) but the hero discovers that it’s actually a terrible force the king wants to unleash on the world (dragon) and has been manipulating the hero to his own maniacal ends the entire time.

    All thoughts welcome.

  14. B. Macon 01 Apr 2009 at 10:20 am

    Hmm. I suspect that it would really help you if the hero has a climactic struggle with the villain, or at least the villains’ top knight/bodyguard.

    The concept of the villain using the hero to his own ends reminds me a lot of Aladdin and Final Fantasy II. Hmm. I’d recommend playing it a little bit differently.

    1. The villain successfully plays the hero. The hero spends the first half of the book finding the MacGuffin and returns it to the villain.

    2. The villain uses the MacGuffin to make himself vastly more powerful. (This is a great excuse to make him strong enough to have a climactic fight, by the way). The villain does Bad Stuff with it, like invading his neighbors and declaring himself a god. Perhaps the villain offers him some high-ranking position (like Lord Knight or something), but the hero refuses (perhaps uneasily).

    3. It’s up to the hero to undo what he unleashed in the second half of the book. I would recommend emphasizing that this quest is completely optional for the hero, rather than forced upon the hero by the villain. (For example, if the villain tries to kill the hero for no good reason, then that would force the hero into this). That will give you some more room to develop the hero.

  15. Bretton 01 Apr 2009 at 11:20 am

    Perhaps I should explain more. There is a climactic battle, just not with the king. Here’s the oversimplified explanation:

    1. Hero goes on quest with a companion and a bumbling fool tagalong the king sends to keep track of their progress.

    2. The hero, after a long and arduous journey, like the quest for the Golden Fleece. He reaches the Great Wazoo and prepares to claim it.

    3. It is revealed that the Wazoo is incredibly destructive and that the the Tagalong is a deadly competent, intelligent, and powerful though half-mad general/sorcerer.

    4. Hero defeats said crazy guy and returns to depose the evil king and erect new one in his place.

    5. Success. The End.

    I can’t let the king capture the egg are because:
    1. They realize once they get there that it’s HUGE. Hero can’t exactly carry it. The only way the king was going to actually get it was to send an army. Tagalong would betray Hero, possibly kill him, assume command and take the egg.

    2. It’s a DRAGON EGG, and I have no way to do a dragon cleanup after it’s unleashed. I can’t simply put it back. Besides, this dragon is supposed to belong to Edmond quite a few decades later, so it can’t hatch yet. Even if it did, it wouldn’t become a doomsday weapon overnight, unlike in the Eragon film. XD

    3. The evil king is not really the fight-ish type. It doesn’t fit his personality. He is more likely to have others (Tagalong) fight for him.

    You opinion may change in light of this. Any other suggestions?

  16. Bretton 01 Apr 2009 at 11:20 am

    hee hee. Eragon film. :P

  17. Ragged Boyon 01 Apr 2009 at 11:29 am

    Ola!, Brett. I suspect your writing has been going along well. Haven’t heard from you in a while, and a lot of things have changed since you’ve been gone. Did I mention I finished issue #1 of Showtime. Were you around when I introduced Showtime? You should come around more often. What’s wrong with you?! When I find you, we’re gonna fight!

    Just kidding. :-)

    Is this from the same story you’ve been working on? Or a new one? I need updates.

  18. Ragged Boyon 01 Apr 2009 at 11:31 am

    Oh, wait. Is this the prequel to your current story?

  19. B. Macon 01 Apr 2009 at 11:34 am

    Bearing in mind this is just my personal reaction, it doesn’t seem very interesting to me. The stakes are never very high for the hero. It never looks like the king has the upper hand on him. Even when the King sends a competent tagalong/assassin, he fails to either finish the hero or recover the egg. Moreover, once the hero has beaten off the tagalong, what’s his incentive to fight the king rather than move somewhere the king can’t follow him?

    Also, if the egg really is a doomsday device, then we know that the king will never hatch it. (Authors almost never end a book with the villain destroying the world… it makes it harder to write a sequel, for one). I think that makes it a bit undramatic because readers will know that the hero can’t lose to this king.

  20. Bretton 01 Apr 2009 at 3:25 pm

    Yes, RB, this is a prequel. Remember that senior project book I was talking about? XD I’m into chapter 6. My previous work is undergoing some changes and has been put on hiatus. Congrats on finishing issue #1. Thats a big milestone. I remember Showtime vaguely, but beyond the name, I got nothing. Sorry. A memory-jogger would help. :)

  21. Bretton 01 Apr 2009 at 3:31 pm

    @ BMac,

    In my oversimplification, i left out a big facet of the story. The story is focused on the growth and development of the hero, who is struggling to get out of his father’s shadow. (his father was a legend. ouch.) The quest is just a means to highlight that struggle.

    As for the king never having the upper hand: There is a point where the hero realizes that he’s been duped, but its too late. The tagalong/assassin leads an ARMY to capture the egg near the end. Thats several hundred to a thousand warriors vs. 2 guys (one’s actually a girl but anyway) and some rag-tag tribesmen. I’d say thats an upper hand.

    The dragon is not really a doomsday device. In the kings hands it would be more like a really powerful slave, used for beating rivals into submission, not random destruction.

    does this help?

  22. B. Macon 01 Apr 2009 at 9:23 pm

    Unless the villain gets the egg, having that big army doesn’t actually amount to much. It’s sort of typical for the villain to get a hold of the MacGuffin, at least temporarily, to raise the stakes. If the MacGuffin is some sort of weapon or power-enhancement device, usually he’ll use it on a small target. For example, in Goldeneye, Trevelyan uses the Goldeneye device on a Siberian compound to cover his tracks. The effect of that is to establish that the Goldeneye is very dangerous, so James Bond absolutely can’t let him use it on London.

  23. The ReTARDISed Whovianon 02 Apr 2009 at 5:44 am

    Do you think Cable’s motivation for wanting to kill Isaac is good enough?

    - Isaac is screwing up the mob’s business by stopping kidnappings, bank robberies etc
    - After whining to his father (the mob boss) for an opportunity to use his powers, Cable is finally given a job: humiliate the Guardian and drag him away to a secret location to be shot.
    - This way, his dad would eliminate his worst enemy and Cable would shut up.

    Since he was raised by the crime family and had violence introduced as a solution to all problems early on in his life, Cable is more than willing to kill for his dad’s business.

    I still need a supervillain name for him, along with an origin story. Any suggestions?

    Thanks.

  24. Bretton 02 Apr 2009 at 6:42 am

    Do you have any comments on using the character’s internal struggles as the focus of the story with the quest as only a driving force?

    Also, if I used “obstacles” would that make the story more interesting? For example, the hero at different points in his journey is haunted by a specter, attacked by a giant rattlesnake, waylaid by a beautiful queen, and has to fight a gargoyle and water demon before he can get to the egg, and then the people who own it dont trust him.

  25. B. Macon 02 Apr 2009 at 8:58 am

    Hey, Whovian. Here are some thoughts and observations…

    –Cable sounds exotic enough that I think a supervillain name would be superfluous. (However, Cable is already the name of a fairly prominent character in X-Men, so it might be worth considering an adaptation or new name).

    –If Cable is whiny, he may annoy readers. Generally, I recommend sticking with competent and impressive villains because they make the hero seem more competent and impressive for beating them. (The only reason anyone remembers Luke Skywalker is because he beat Darth Vader).

    –I imagine his origin story will be very similar to Isaac’s, just much darker. Instead of found by a friendly family, Cable was discovered by a seedy family with a ton of problems. When they discovered that Cable had superpowers, they sold him to the crime group. Also, it’s not a huge deal, but I’m having trouble envisioning how Isaac’s family might have come to have him without knowing that he came from nowhere. (I suppose someone else might have discovered the baby, turned him into child services, and then child services put him up for adoption… but even then wouldn’t there some bizarre evidence that the child was in something like a spaceship?)

  26. Ragged Boyon 02 Apr 2009 at 9:00 am

    Obstacles would create goals to accomplish, so that would keep the story from joyriding.

    What exactly is the main character’s internal struggle? Confidence? Fear? I suspect it would depend how much the struggle bares about the character.

  27. B. Macon 02 Apr 2009 at 9:00 am

    “Do you have any comments on using the character’s internal struggles as the focus of the story with the quest as only a driving force?”

    Hmm. What are some examples of recent novels that have done that successfully? I suspect that a publisher would feel more comfortable with the concept if there were a few examples that sold fairly well.

  28. Bretton 02 Apr 2009 at 7:34 pm

    @ RB, the hero is struggling with trying to escape the shadow of his father, who was a LEGENDARY hero. A big part of the story is that father-son dynamic, except the father is dead. most of the stuff we hear about him comes from the hero’s thoughts and other characters.

    @BMac, I’ll probably be visiting Notre Dame this summer. XD WOOT! And yeah, i know you probably wont be there and that tracking you down is probably not ethical. Just thought i’d let you know anyway. :)

  29. Ragged Boyon 02 Apr 2009 at 7:39 pm

    Ok, I like that. I think can supply you with a lot of interesting scenes.

    “Forget that! That’s something my father would do.”

  30. Wingson 02 Apr 2009 at 9:02 pm

    Hey, I need help with my main villain, Scarlet’s backstory. So far it is hopelessly cliche, and as a fanfic reader (and writer!) I hate cliches with a passion. Here it is in case you haven’t visited me yet:

    Scarlet (real name unknown)

    Scarlet was born with the powers of hypnosis and possession. He was a genius gone wrong. Shunned and taunted as a child because of his love for the paranormal, he devoted all of his energy to learning about the paranormal world, hoping to study it as an adult. Three years after graduating from college, the 21-year-old Scarlet brought his findings to the scientific world. He was thought to be insane because of his studies, and, in a rage, possessed the scientific leaders and slaughtered them all. Driven nearly to madness, he still vowed revenge against the world that had shunned him.

    Many years later, he assumed the guise of Byron Stanwood and became principal of Visvires Academy. After many failures, he created an chemical that would mimic the changes caused to his genes which granted him his powers. This chemical created the artificial Naturals: Meg, Ian, Pierce, Jazz, Connor, Darren, Heather, Zak, Alexis, Lucia and Blake. Although he still has half of the Titan’s Diamond when the last two Specials, Sparks and Bladedge, battle him, he is defeated and his power, although naturally given, is erased by the Titan’s Diamond. However, as his power was truly natural, not gifted or artificial, his evil consciousness is also absorbed, and he dies. Although the Specials initially agree to hide the Titan’s Diamond after they found it impossible to completely destroy, Connor, unknown to the others, pocketed one shard of the diamond.

    Two years later, everything seems to have died down. Nearly all of the Specials have graduated, and all the others have long forgotten the events of two years past. Connor Reed now attends Visvires Academy, and is the last one still at the school who kept his powers. When a rogue thief finds most of the Titan’s Diamond, Scarlet’s consciousness passes into his body. The vengeful Scarlet swears to destroy not only the world, but the universe, Connor must use the Titan’s Diamond to create the second generation of Specials, with himself as the leader. Backed by Pierce, Meg, Ian, and Jazz, Connor must be able to command a new force of heroes…..where losing means death to not only the heroes, but the universe.

    —————

    Uber-cliche.

    - Wings

  31. The ReTARDISed Whovianon 03 Apr 2009 at 3:12 am

    Cable was originally meant to be called Caleb, but I misspelled it and actually liked it better. Sometimes mistakes give me my best ideas. Haha.

    My main intention with Cable’s whining is to use it for comedy purposes. He’s a badass jerk of a guy who can kill in an instant, but he’s also a spoiled brat. I wrote this scene to introduce him:

    “We just got the intel back from the Melina attempt,” said a man, walking into an office. His boss looked him up and down, taking in his slightly dishevelled hair, slumped shoulders and pale face, instantly knowing that the job hadn’t ended well.

    “What went wrong this time?” asked Kade Ryans, stubbing out the cigar in his left hand. The remnants of smoke curled upwards in a ghostly dance, dissipating near the ceiling. (I know I said before that none of my characters would smoke, but I’ve made it so only Kade does. He tosses a cigar to Cable in one scene, but Cable says “I’d rather not commit slow and painful suicide.”)

    “The Guardian interfered. Again,” said the other man.

    Kade groaned. “That annoying little brat. We need to kill him once and for all. He’s already prevented five jobs from going through.”

    A young man slammed the door open, showing no respect to Kade at all. He put a hand on the Baroque desk, something that was often punished by death.

    “Let me do it!” he demanded. His blonde hair fell into his eyes as Kade sat silent.

    “I’m not sure of your capabilities yet, Cable.”

    Cable whined a little, tossing his head back. “You always say that, Dad. If you’d just let me do something to help with the family business I’d stop asking! I’m a million times as powerful as these hacks you’ve hired!” He gestured at the other man, who gave Kade a pleading look. He nodded and the man left in a hurry, straightening his tie as he gladly walked out.

    “That may be so,” he said, cutting Cable off before he could continue. He gestured to a chair and the young man dropped into it. “But we have no plan as of yet. I’ll see if there is room for you in it once it’s all written down.”

    “But I know you’ll purposely leave me out!”

    “Jeez, did I raise a whiner? Please, tell me I did not raise a whiner.”

    “Hey! You didn’t raise a whiner!” objected Cable.

    “Yeah, that’s your mother’s fault.”

    I’m working on two different versions of the story; one where he has Isaac’s powers, and one where he has ice powers. I just thought of an origin story for his ice powers. I’ll post it on “Plausible Origin Stories”.

  32. B. Macon 03 Apr 2009 at 5:26 am

    “His boss looked him up and down, taking in his slightly dishevelled hair, slumped shoulders and pale face, instantly knowing that the job hadn’t ended well.” This is a bit convoluted. I’d recommend making “instantly knowing that the job hadn’t ended well” into its own sentence.

    I think “dishevelled” should be spelled “disheveled.” This might just be an American thing, though (like traveled and traveler).

    I’d recommend taking out “Kade groaned.” He doesn’t seem much like a groaner.

    “We need to kill him once and for all.” I’d recommend eliminating “once and for all.”

    “something that was often punished by death” is a bit passive. Also, how often does he need to kill people for handling his desk? I’d recommend changing this to a single incident. For example, “Cade had immediately executed the last punk to make that mistake.

    “He gestured at the other man, who gave Kade a pleading look.” I’m not sure what he’s pleading for.

    “Hey! You didn’t raise a whiner!” I’d recommend changing this to something like “Hey! I’m not a whiner.” I’d also axing the phrase “objected Cable” because it’s obvious who is saying this line.

    If the son’s name is Cable, I’d recommend something more distinct for Cade.

    I’m not quite feeling the Cade-Cable relationship. Cade kills people for handling his desk and hardly even attempts to rein in his apparently whiny son. At the very least, I’d recommend a little bit of mocking/derision from the father when the son claims that he’s ready to beat on the Guardian. Look at this from the perspective of the father– the Guardian just beat his men five separate times. Those were good men– Cade doesn’t hire slackers, of course. When his son claims that he can take the Guardian, I think Cade should reject this slight against his men more forcefully.

    I don’t have a good feel for Cade’s voice. Sometimes he sounds like a hard-bitten mobster (“tell me I did not raise a whiner”). Other times he sounds more white-collar and wishy-washy: “I’m not sure of your capabilities yet, Cable.” I’d recommend going with a rougher, blue-collar voice because I think that will create more conflict with the whiny son. Blue-collar fits his personality better.

    In this scene, I did not find Cable’s whining unduly obnoxious. Nicely done.

  33. The ReTARDISed Whovianon 03 Apr 2009 at 7:19 am

    Okay, thanks! Here’s my redone scene:

    “We just got the intel back from the Melina attempt,” said a man, walking into an office. His boss looked him up and down, taking in his slightly disheveled hair, slumped shoulders and pale face. He instantly knew that the job hadn’t ended well.

    “What went wrong this time?” asked Kade Ryans, stubbing out the cigar in his left hand. The remnants of smoke curled upwards in a ghostly dance, dissipating near the ceiling.

    “The Guardian interfered. Again,” said the other man.

    Kade groaned. “That annoying little brat. We need to kill him. He’s already prevented five jobs from going through.”

    A young man slammed the door open, showing no respect to Kade at all. He put a hand on the Baroque desk. Anyone who touched it usually met a violent and painful death.

    “Let me do it!” he demanded. His blonde hair fell into his eyes as Kade sat silent.

    “You can’t take him on. The Guardian has wiped out several of my men, landing them in jail. You aren’t as professional as them, and your personality is far from serious.”

    Cable whined a little, tossing his head back. “You always say that, Dad. If you’d just let me do something to help with the family business I’d stop asking! I’m a million times as powerful as these hacks you’ve hired!” He gestured at the other man. Kade nodded and the man left in a hurry, straightening his tie as he gladly walked out.

    “You’ve just proved my point,” he said, cutting Cable off before he could continue. He gestured to a chair and the young man dropped into it. “Your incessant whining makes me want to kill you at times. Believe me, I have come close to shooting you on more than one occasion.”

    Cable scoffed. “Have you somehow managed to miss the fact that I have awesome unstoppable powers?”

    “Stop arguing with me. I may end up needing you in the operation anyway. You’re the only one with abilities close to the Guardian’s. I can’t guarantee a place for you, and if you aren’t needed, I’ll assign you to something smaller.”

    “But something smaller would suck!”

    “…Fine. I will try to find a spot for you in this one. If I can figure out a place where you can use your Narcissism and not look like Daddy’s Little Mobster, then you can have it.”

    “Finally!”

    Kade put a hand to his forehead. “How did this happen?”

    Cable shrugged. “I don’t know. How did what happen?”

    “You must get that whiny attitude from your mother.”

    I looked for names similar to Kade but less similar to Cable. I got nothing. I just like the contrast; Kade seems like a harder name than Cable. Kade is more serious and Cable is a reborn Narcissus.

    What’s a white-collar or blue-collar person? We don’t have terms like that in the wonderful land of Oz.

  34. B. Macon 03 Apr 2009 at 8:02 am

    Hmm. You can see an explanation of white-collar vs. blue-collar here, but the short version is that white-collar workers tend to have college educations and are usually softer around the edges. Blue-collar workers are usually a bit rougher and more brusque.

  35. The ReTARDISed Whovianon 03 Apr 2009 at 4:21 pm

    Okay, thanks!

  36. BrianTayloron 20 Jun 2009 at 9:59 am

    Longtime lurker, first time poster here! LOL!

    I read elsewhere on the site that villains who wish to destroy the world is a little overdone. How about a villain who doesn’t want to destroy the world, but instead wants to clear it of all life and rebuild/repopulate it with his minions? Or does that sound corny? Hehe!

  37. B. Macon 20 Jun 2009 at 5:04 pm

    It makes more sense than wanting to destroy the world, Brian. It is a bit two-dimensionally evil, though.

  38. Don 04 Jul 2009 at 4:32 pm

    Hi! Man, do I need some help. I need some help building a strong plot with my villain. After all, if my villain doesn’t have a super awesomely bad motive, what’s going to motivate my protagonist and his friends?
    As for the ideas I have so far:

    My villain is a young, handsome, exceptional scientist/doctor who is blind. He has some tools that sometimes give him vision. He has a woman that he works on and really… likes. He has implanted a chip in her neck that can manipulate her brain’s electrical impulses. Basically, he can exercise some degree of control over her mind. He plans to use her to carry out some of his evil deeds.

    He is also working on creating a new type of radiation that travels in light. During a test run, the power of it is much stronger than he anticipated, and it breaks out of its containment… this “light radiation” hits the good guys because they have had a car accident close to the building. So pretty much, the villain is accidentally responsible for giving the good guys the powers to beat him.

    OK, so I don’t know how it is so far. Can anyone throw around some plot ideas, something that will kind of force my protagonists and friends to go after this guy… maybe even save the world? :O

    My personal idea was something along the lines of the villain wanting to get revenge because he’s blind.. he was made fun of when he was young, etc. But what kind of revenge? Why? Hmm. I didn’t think this was too great of an idea.

    Feel free to say anything you want, ask questions, anything. Sorry if I missed anything.. I don’t think my head’s on right today. Thanks.

  39. Marissaon 04 Jul 2009 at 4:53 pm

    D, I finished those two chapters a few days ago and have been waiting for you to get on. :O

  40. Ragged Boyon 04 Jul 2009 at 4:59 pm

    Let’s see, I’d definitely not make his motive revenge for being picked on. It seems like a petty thing to go super-villain over. What exactly is the light radiation supposed do to people? Is it supposed to give people powers? Maybe, in the beginning, he was making the special light to fix his own vision and when he used it on himself it made him go insane agave him some special crazy vision. This can be after the accident that gives the heroes their powers. He then decided that he wanted the world to be blind and see what he see. So he manufactures the light and begins to release it on city and people randomly start going blind (I’m guessing the heroes would be immune) and a few failed experiments run wild wreaking havoc. This would then forces the heroes to act, and thus, begin the plot.

    What do you think?

  41. B. Macon 05 Jul 2009 at 2:11 am

    Hmm. It sounds like his romantic feelings for the woman get a bit shortchanged by the cybernetic implant. I’d recommend something like this: He tries to date her. She says no– she politely explains that dating a blind person just wouldn’t be the same as dating someone that can see. I think the trick here is making her seem sympathetic/reasonable while making this explanation seem so crushing to him that it could justify a life of villainy. In response to this, he decides to carry out something ridiculously grand to impress her. (If that sounds implausible, please keep in mind that John Hinckley attempted to assassinate then-President Reagan to impress actress Jodie Foster).

    I imagine that the early stages of this would include something like a bank robbery– not because he wants or needs the money, but just because I imagine that she’d be concerned about a blind guy’s ability to provide for himself and a family.

    Over time, I imagine that she would recoil from his attempts to woo her and he will try harder. Eventually, I suspect that she will finally and resolutely reject him. At that point, I imagine that he would decide to do at least one of the following: 1) go into a psychotic, “everything must die” kind of mentality. 2) Decide to kill her. The heroes have to save her. 3) Decide to force her to love her, starting with a kidnapping. He might have convinced himself that the only reason she doesn’t love him is that her friends and co-workers are confusing and misleading her, so he has to save her from them.

    Alternately. He’s doing pretty well without full sight, but she holds his blindness against him, right? Maybe he decides to blind everyone so that she won’t think less of him for being blind.

    For a slightly different, possibly more philosophical motivation, you could have him blind everyone so that they will empathize more with the handicapped. You could still work in the woman here as the inciting event that convinces him that healthy people are just not able to understand what handicapped people go through.



    I’m a bit more concerned about the heroes. They get their powers mainly through good luck– they just happened to be outside when the accident happened, right? That kind of makes them Chosen Ones. I suspect that it would be more interesting if they did something that helped them get their powers. For example, maybe they’re outside when the doctor’s accident happens, and they rush inside looking for survivors at the first sign of trouble, and then they get their powers because they were at ground zero when the machine finally explodes.

  42. Marissaon 05 Jul 2009 at 3:32 pm

    B. Mac, I think you misunderstood D.

    D never said that it was the woman who caused him to go evil, just that the woman was one of his schemes and that he wants to be with her. The woman is the present, not the past.

    If I was the one to misunderstand, my mistake.

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