“3. How would you comfort someone who’s crying? I know that with sometimes, it’s usually just a matter of stroking a person’s hair and saying, “Shh, it’ll be okay…”, but what would you do for someone who’s seriously hysterical? If they told you to leave them alone, would you do it, or would you go over and comfort them?”
* It depends. There was this one really good book I read recently with a male MC who was trying not to cry, and he was shaking and tearing up backed up against a wall, and he yelled at his uncle to leave. His uncle swore he wouldn’t, you know, “I’m not gonna leave you again,” kinda deal, and in the story it was pretty heartwarming. The uncle knew his nephew needed him, so he stayed. That’s probably why a character would stay with their friend even if they screamed at them to get out.

“4.There’s always that one stoic person…The one who’s always there for you to lean on, who’ll help you out, no matter what…What would it take for a person like this to break? On my team, it’s Daniel. He’s been through a lot. He’ll always push his team to the limits, and Rebecca doesn’t seem to like him much. I was thinking that the best way for him to seem human is to have him quietly crying in the middle of the night, after everyone else is asleep. Thing is, I can’t think of a single thing that would scare him that badly…Maybe if one of the other characters almost died…?”
* You don’t need to have your characters crying to show that they can break. This is a bit cliche, but maybe he wakes up at night screaming with these awful nightmares. That’s something out of his control, but would show that he’s starting to lose it.

Hope this helped! :3

1. The one thing that I don’t see a lot of in books/TV is crying in pain. Again, I know that this depends on the age. If an adult breaks an arm, he’d probably grit his teeth and maybe wince in pain, but a little kid would be wailing. That aside, my characters range in age from 12 to 15. They’re probably going to receive some serious injuries over the course of the book. Is there any way that I can make them cry in pain without making them look like serious wimps?

2. Um, also, I know that boys don’t cry as easily as girls, but is there any way to have a male character cry without making him seem weak? Like, Adam is pretty fragile (emotionally and physically), and he has some pretty good excuses for crying (just lost his home, doesn’t even know where his family is, at any given time could hurt his friends, has just killed a bunch of people without knowing it…The list goes on), but is it possible to have him cry openly without it being too pathetic?

3. How would you comfort someone who’s crying? I know that with sometimes, it’s usually just a matter of stroking a person’s hair and saying, “Shh, it’ll be okay…”, but what would you do for someone who’s seriously hysterical? If they told you to leave them alone, would you do it, or would you go over and comfort them?

4.There’s always that one stoic person…The one who’s always there for you to lean on, who’ll help you out, no matter what…What would it take for a person like this to break? On my team, it’s Daniel. He’s been through a lot. He’ll always push his team to the limits, and Rebecca doesn’t seem to like him much. I was thinking that the best way for him to seem human is to have him quietly crying in the middle of the night, after everyone else is asleep. Thing is, I can’t think of a single thing that would scare him that badly…Maybe if one of the other characters almost died…?

Yeah, sorry for the length of this…I just really need a lot of help!

Hmm, this is of interest to me as I have one character who has a tendency to cry, and I’m planning on having a character cry some in another story…

The first guy, Lorenzo (Lorri for short), is kind of sensitive. He gts hurt easily and will show it if he gets enough beating, especially if it’s about something he’s proud of such as his cooking. (He is the cook on a pirate ship and to him, food is Serious Business, and he onsiders himself a very good cook.)

The second is a romance story. Modern day, college age characters. Basically, the girl (Aria) has been dating one guy (who needs a name) for several months, and has convinced herself that she’s in love with him, and wants to marry him, and he seems to feel the same way. She’s poured much of herself ino this relationship. Then… she finds him making out with someone else, and is absolutly crushed. She tries to hold back her pain but upon running into anoter guy (Brad) whom she’s been good friends with for months she breaks down. Hmm, a bit cliche, but I like it.

However, I think it’s important to remember that it isn’t your character crying that makes the reader feel sadness. It’s the situation. If the reader isn’t invested in the situation, they aren’t going to feel sad no matter how graphically you describe your character’s sobbing.

IN fact, the /more/ your character grieves for a situation that the reader doesn’t care about (or only marginally cares about) then the /less/ sympathetic the reader is going to be.

Personally I’d much rather read about a character who honestly sobs or bawls in the face of tragedy, than to read about some ridiculous single tear or unbelievable stoicism. (I really really hate that stupid single tear. If my heroine has reason to cry she’s going to cry like a real woman with choking sobs and snot and all. I would rather have that than give her that messed up single tear running from her crystal cerulean orbs down her perfect cheek. *gags* Give me honest crying and then she can go kick arse or whatever afterward…. but I digress.)

Anyway. I think grief is fine– demonstrated in an appropriate manner for that particular character– when the situation warrants it. But you just can’t expect your reader to be sad /just/ because your character is, or just because you described the crying at length or oh so poetically. It’s best not to waste time trying to tug heartstrings with the description of the crying, because it’s the tragedy that caused them to cry that matters, not the fact that they cried or didn’t cry.

Also you don’t have to belabor the description of the crying. You can end scene at the height of the tragedy and resume the action when the action actually resumes. We don’t have to read long passages of the sobbing or even long passages of the character “remembering” her sorrow. If the character really was destroyed by grief for some extended period I’d rather have all that moping take place “off camera” so to speak and let us pick up again at the moment that she begins to pull herself together again.

- Wings

I think I’ve had…one crying scene between my various books. Considering that it happened when a mind controlled character almost killed their love interest, I think it’s acceptable.

- Wings

I read a book once where the main character cried for AN ENTIRE CHAPTER! I’m not joking. I think the book was pulled off the market or something but it was almost to the point of annoyance and hilarity because the reason for crying was so stupid: their boy friend of two weeks broke up with them. I can understand if it was their boyfriend of two years but that was ridiculous.

Thanks for mentioning my Emotion Thesaurus!

Thank you, Lightning Man, for your support.

The crying you’re describing might work, yeah, as long as there is a reason, even if it isn’t known. But you did well in advising people to be careful. What may seem like a good reason to them might seem stupid to the reader (“BUT HER FATHER DIED TEN YEARS AGO AND SHE JUST NOW THOUGHT ABOUT IT AGAIN,” in an otherwise happy scene, for example).

What I was referring to is when a character would naturally be sad. If the author heads straight to crying, that glosses over the whole emotional process, and the reader feels gypped.