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For a tangent from our comic book offerings, J.M. presents these five questions guaranteed to tell whether you’re a Democrat, Republican, Libertarian or Communist.

What does America need more of?

Democrat: Tolerance.

Republican: Free-fire zones.

Libertarian: Porn stars.

Communist: Communists.

Who do you trust most to protect your liberties?

Democrat: The state.

Republican: Bush and Cheney.

Libertarian: Smith and Wesson.

Communist: Next question.

You hear that a politician had sex with 15 interns. How do you feel?

Republican: Enraged.

Libertarian: Jealous.

Democrat: My attorney has advised me not to answer any questions.

Communist: Eh… a man of the people is still just a man.

Why do you tolerate your political enemies?

Democrat: They have the guns.

Republican: I feel bad beating up sissies.

Libertarian: I’ve got enough drugs to go around.

Communist: Because anyone can be re-educated.

How would you react if you heard that the government was reinstating the draft?

Republican: Basra or Bust!

Democrat: I wonder what Toronto’s weather is like.

Libertarian: Not too worried. I’ve got so many drug arrests I’d send draft officers running to Canada.

Communist: I hope I’m not a minesweeper.

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